For a time, I was Edmond. The Ice Queen was mesmerizing, almost hypnotizing. The Ice Queen had a certain otherworldly appeal, an indescribable quality...when face to face with this, all physicality ceased and left was only a connection that defies words.
The Ice Queen sat above all others. Beyond all others. I did that, actually. That is where I put the Ice Queen. He took notice of this new Spiritual Child, saw the thirst. Saw the driving desire and raw need to KNOW. And the Ice Queen knew.
The Ice Queen as He.
He knew. He saw. And then He Agreed. The Ice Queen made a conscious decision to teach, to mentor, to introduce, and to welcome Edmond into this magical and mystical world. To take Edmond under his wing and into his family.
Edmond as Me.
As a spiritual child, as a baby in this big wide world of conspiracies and energies and colors and magickal workings, I learned first - and I mean first, before any other lesson - that my previous beliefs were false. That my hunches, that my knee jerk reactions, and my very "conscience" was built on faulty identity...faulty beliefs from childhood - religious, societal, and even earthly.
Therefore, I was questioning every internal message. Sometimes to the point that I felt I was losing my mind.
Not to worry, the Ice Queen as He gave comfort like I had never experienced.
You think I'm kidding? You think I'm exaggerating? You think I'm being overly dramatic? Go back to Narnia, the book, and read about what the Queen Witch actually gave Edmond. Discover the nature of Turkish Delight, then come talk to me.
I went to look that up, and I found the most interesting information...I had forgotten that in Narnia, she is actually the Snow Queen, not the Ice Queen. Ice Queen fits for my experience, though. I also found that she was called the White Witch.
Now, that is fucking eerie.... quite fitting....wow...
Needing to breathe for a moment.
Do not fashion me a maiden who needs saving from the dragons. I am the Dragon. And I will eat you whole.