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Crazy making

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Blue Rising
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Crazy making

Postby Blue Rising » Tue Jun 27, 2017 5:50 pm

I can't really find a place where this fits. So, I will start another thread, another train of thought. This is so huge, so difficult, that I'm not sure where to start. I never would have seen this as anything other than what it looks like, years ago. But this isn't years ago. This is now, this is when I can see sometimes. When I intuit sometimes. When weird shit is very, very real sometimes. When other realities, other worlds, other...I don't even know what they are...happen right inside this one. Which one is this one, which one is real? Which one to believe... And how they exist in the same space is sometimes beyond me.

Let me start with this. We are home from the hospital, my daughter still among us. We were at one local Emergency Room on Wednesday. Twice stabilized and sent home. Thursday, we went to an ER in a different town, and they admitted her. We were there for four days. So...five days in and out, in and out...you get the idea. She has a bacteria, she probably ingested it in some raw milk we got from the local dairy last week. In addition though, she contracted a virus that she will now live with. Recovery is slow.

Ok, the update is done. Now the pondering. Here's the thing. I do not know what the hell is going on. This sweet girl is so freaking sick. When we went to the ER the very first time, she was talking nonsense. Jibberish. Babble. Kind of like hallucinating, but I have no idea if she was seeing or hearing anything. Sure did get my attention. The first ER team said dehydration can cause this, and filled her up with fluids. (Along with getting her stabilized.)

The second trip to the ER, we were in the car, and she said to me that she felt like she was going to start not making sense again. That was an odd statement. I don't think she could have gotten dehydrated again just a few hours after having IV fluids. And sure enough, in the ER, I could see that she was somehow fading in and out of this world. Well, they gave her a drug called Ativan to help with the nausea, and next thing you know she is really making no sense. She was relaying to me that the star on the painting in the hallway was coming to life and eating all the other things in the picture. That “they” were trying to trap her so they could dissect her. That I was not her mom, that she was scared they were going to do something with me.

Here is where the splitting of worlds happened. The doctor wanted me to come out into the hall with him. Meanwhile, he sent a nurse in to assess Em for psychiatric problems. Well, that pissed me off. And actually....I had no way to explain this, but it was the spirit of the illness. Not a fucking psychiatric problem. In that very brief time...somewhere...something happened.

I rejoined Em. I looked into her soul, I listened to her words that made no sense in the 3d. Dammit, I know she was in there, I know something else had ahold of her, I know she was trying with all she had to get to me...

But that makes absolutely no sense. None. My reasoning, logical, 3d mind understands why the medical team jumped to what they did. But the “Other” of me knows that was not the issue.

---Stop---

You know what? There are those of us who have access to more than just one world...and we have to co-exist with those who do not. So then, which group is the crazy group?

More processing needed.
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Re: Crazy making

Postby Sandy Clark » Wed Jun 28, 2017 2:19 am

Neither :)

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Re: Crazy making

Postby Eelco » Wed Jun 28, 2017 6:04 am

Wow Bleu,

That is quite the ordeal. I would go crazy if one of my children would suffer through something like that.
As Sandy was saying I don't think either group is the crazy one.

When you talked about the spirit of the disease possessing her that sounded about right.
Just going off on a mind wandering here.

Seeing both worlds as you do, there may just be a nudging. To take care of both sides of it.
On the one hand trust allopathic medicine to do what they can. On the other hand.
Do what you can energy wise to get the spirit of the disease to leave.

Thinking protectional herbs, tinctures and possibly spelling to understand what it wants and get it to leave?
But then..

Maybe I'm the crazy one.

With Love
Eelco
~ “for what it's worth”~
~Placebo~

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Re: Crazy making

Postby Sandy Clark » Wed Jun 28, 2017 6:31 am

Hi Blue Rising,

It is one of the scariest things to go through watching your child (does not seem to matter how old they get) struggle with a serious health concern and feel so helpless to fix it. Thoughts and good energy vibes coming your way.

One thing I'm sure you have thought of but maybe not>>>>has your daughter conjured up this illness unconsciously for unknown reasons as of yet? Sometimes it is good to look and see what life is like for them a little more than surface. I say this as I have a Granddaughter who is struggling with teenage Mono or Kissing Disease as they say.

She seems to just about get her energy back and then relapses not getting fully better even tho' she has had meds, lots of bed rest and down time. At the same time she is struggling with a major identity crisis. She appears to not be able to get a handle on this identity concern and thus needs NOT to be pushed to get moving and so keeps the maintenance of not being well; in tow;>>> possibly??

Just some food for thought along with well wishes and good health for one and all, and to save a little stress>>>>sooner than later. ;)

you
Blue Rising wrote:I can't really find a place where this fits. So, I will start another thread, another train of thought. This is so huge, so difficult, that I'm not sure where to start. I never would have seen this as anything other than what it looks like, years ago. But this isn't years ago. This is now, this is when I can see sometimes. When I intuit sometimes. When weird shit is very, very real sometimes. When other realities, other worlds, other...I don't even know what they are...happen right inside this one. Which one is this one, which one is real? Which one to believe... And how they exist in the same space is sometimes beyond me.

Let me start with this. We are home from the hospital, my daughter still among us. We were at one local Emergency Room on Wednesday. Twice stabilized and sent home. Thursday, we went to an ER in a different town, and they admitted her. We were there for four days. So...five days in and out, in and out...you get the idea. She has a bacteria, she probably ingested it in some raw milk we got from the local dairy last week. In addition though, she contracted a virus that she will now live with. Recovery is slow.

Ok, the update is done. Now the pondering. Here's the thing. I do not know what the hell is going on. This sweet girl is so freaking sick. When we went to the ER the very first time, she was talking nonsense. Jibberish. Babble. Kind of like hallucinating, but I have no idea if she was seeing or hearing anything. Sure did get my attention. The first ER team said dehydration can cause this, and filled her up with fluids. (Along with getting her stabilized.)

The second trip to the ER, we were in the car, and she said to me that she felt like she was going to start not making sense again. That was an odd statement. I don't think she could have gotten dehydrated again just a few hours after having IV fluids. And sure enough, in the ER, I could see that she was somehow fading in and out of this world. Well, they gave her a drug called Ativan to help with the nausea, and next thing you know she is really making no sense. She was relaying to me that the star on the painting in the hallway was coming to life and eating all the other things in the picture. That “they” were trying to trap her so they could dissect her. That I was not her mom, that she was scared they were going to do something with me.

Here is where the splitting of worlds happened. The doctor wanted me to come out into the hall with him. Meanwhile, he sent a nurse in to assess Em for psychiatric problems. Well, that pissed me off. And actually....I had no way to explain this, but it was the spirit of the illness. Not a fucking psychiatric problem. In that very brief time...somewhere...something happened.

I rejoined Em. I looked into her soul, I listened to her words that made no sense in the 3d. Dammit, I know she was in there, I know something else had ahold of her, I know she was trying with all she had to get to me...

But that makes absolutely no sense. None. My reasoning, logical, 3d mind understands why the medical team jumped to what they did. But the “Other” of me knows that was not the issue.

---Stop---

You know what? There are those of us who have access to more than just one world...and we have to co-exist with those who do not. So then, which group is the crazy group?

More processing needed.

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Re: Crazy making

Postby Sandy Clark » Wed Jun 28, 2017 6:31 am

Sandy Clark wrote:Hi Blue Rising,

It is one of the scariest things to go through watching your child (does not seem to matter how old they get) struggle with a serious health concern and feel so helpless to fix it. Thoughts and good energy vibes coming your way.

One thing I'm sure you have thought of but maybe not>>>>has your daughter conjured up this illness unconsciously for unknown reasons as of yet? Sometimes it is good to look and see what life is like for them a little more than surface. I say this as I have a Granddaughter who is struggling with teenage Mono or Kissing Disease as they say.

She seems to just about get her energy back and then relapses not getting fully better even tho' she has had meds, lots of bed rest and down time. At the same time she is struggling with a major identity crisis. She appears to not be able to get a handle on this identity concern and thus needs NOT to be pushed to get moving and so keeps the maintenance of not being well; in tow>>> possibly??

Just some food for thought along with well wishes and good health for one and all, and to save a little stress>>>>sooner than later. ;)

you
Blue Rising wrote:I can't really find a place where this fits. So, I will start another thread, another train of thought. This is so huge, so difficult, that I'm not sure where to start. I never would have seen this as anything other than what it looks like, years ago. But this isn't years ago. This is now, this is when I can see sometimes. When I intuit sometimes. When weird shit is very, very real sometimes. When other realities, other worlds, other...I don't even know what they are...happen right inside this one. Which one is this one, which one is real? Which one to believe... And how they exist in the same space is sometimes beyond me.

Let me start with this. We are home from the hospital, my daughter still among us. We were at one local Emergency Room on Wednesday. Twice stabilized and sent home. Thursday, we went to an ER in a different town, and they admitted her. We were there for four days. So...five days in and out, in and out...you get the idea. She has a bacteria, she probably ingested it in some raw milk we got from the local dairy last week. In addition though, she contracted a virus that she will now live with. Recovery is slow.

Ok, the update is done. Now the pondering. Here's the thing. I do not know what the hell is going on. This sweet girl is so freaking sick. When we went to the ER the very first time, she was talking nonsense. Jibberish. Babble. Kind of like hallucinating, but I have no idea if she was seeing or hearing anything. Sure did get my attention. The first ER team said dehydration can cause this, and filled her up with fluids. (Along with getting her stabilized.)

The second trip to the ER, we were in the car, and she said to me that she felt like she was going to start not making sense again. That was an odd statement. I don't think she could have gotten dehydrated again just a few hours after having IV fluids. And sure enough, in the ER, I could see that she was somehow fading in and out of this world. Well, they gave her a drug called Ativan to help with the nausea, and next thing you know she is really making no sense. She was relaying to me that the star on the painting in the hallway was coming to life and eating all the other things in the picture. That “they” were trying to trap her so they could dissect her. That I was not her mom, that she was scared they were going to do something with me.

Here is where the splitting of worlds happened. The doctor wanted me to come out into the hall with him. Meanwhile, he sent a nurse in to assess Em for psychiatric problems. Well, that pissed me off. And actually....I had no way to explain this, but it was the spirit of the illness. Not a fucking psychiatric problem. In that very brief time...somewhere...something happened.

I rejoined Em. I looked into her soul, I listened to her words that made no sense in the 3d. Dammit, I know she was in there, I know something else had ahold of her, I know she was trying with all she had to get to me...

But that makes absolutely no sense. None. My reasoning, logical, 3d mind understands why the medical team jumped to what they did. But the “Other” of me knows that was not the issue.

---Stop---

You know what? There are those of us who have access to more than just one world...and we have to co-exist with those who do not. So then, which group is the crazy group?

More processing needed.

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Re: Crazy making

Postby Fred Steeves » Wed Jun 28, 2017 11:03 am

Whoa, this is all a bit more than we chatted about on Skype!

Blue Rising wrote:When weird shit is very, very real sometimes. When other realities, other worlds, other...I don't even know what they are...happen right inside this one. Which one is this one, which one is real? Which one to believe.


I know what you mean, and those are some excellent questions to which I have no solid answers. But then again sometimes "reality" is not so solid, is it?

Blue Rising wrote: The first ER team said dehydration can cause this, and filled her up with fluids.

(Snip)

The doctor wanted me to come out into the hall with him. Meanwhile, he sent a nurse in to assess Em for psychiatric problems. Well, that pissed me off.


LOL, I guess so! Doctors... You know in my experience doctors do a lot of good, in most cases, but one missing thing from their years of training is thinking outside the box. No matter how freaky sick we may get, there will never be a Dr. House hold up in some room with his crack team of assistants, furiously scribbling on the Glenn Beck chalk board trying to figure out what's wrong.

If "the book" doesn't produce a clear and instant diagnosis, they will settle on the one that comes the closest.

Blue Rising wrote:This sweet girl is so freaking sick. When we went to the ER the very first time, she was talking nonsense. Jibberish. Babble. Kind of like hallucinating, but I have no idea if she was seeing or hearing anything. Sure did get my attention.

(Snip)

She was relaying to me that the star on the painting in the hallway was coming to life and eating all the other things in the picture. That “they” were trying to trap her so they could dissect her. That I was not her mom, that she was scared they were going to do something with me.


Remember when my friend old man KC up the mountain from us died a little over a year ago? When I was visiting him in his hospital room the last two days before he passed on, he was coming up with that same weird kind of shit. He was half Cherokee, so therefore his nurse was now the wise and experienced medicine woman. The T.V. was now a portal into a different dimension. If I were to turn a certain knob on the wall, a hidden door would appear. Etc...

Blue Rising wrote: I rejoined Em. I looked into her soul, I listened to her words that made no sense in the 3d. Dammit, I know she was in there, I know something else had ahold of her, I know she was trying with all she had to get to me...


So was KC, but he was fading too fast to make it back out. I couldn't help him, all I could do was be there.

So how sick was E? She was pretty damn sick wasn't she? The reason I bring up my own little story, is because I'm thinking this sort of thing may happen sometimes when someone is so sick, that their body is in the process of shutting down. Is it the spirit of the illness, or is it the circuits in the brain starting to misfire?

To me it could be either one, or it could be both. There may even be other options, hell if I know. I've only known two people who had this happen, and both of them moved on to other things. It sounds like Emma is going to be okay thank goodness, it would sure be interesting to hear what she may remember of all this when she's well again.

Blue Rising wrote: You know what? There are those of us who have access to more than just one world...and we have to co-exist with those who do not. So then, which group is the crazy group?


Probably both! :)
The unexamined life is not worth living.

Socrates

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Re: Crazy making

Postby Blue Rising » Wed Jun 28, 2017 1:38 pm

Eelco wrote:Wow Bleu,

That is quite the ordeal. I would go crazy if one of my children would suffer through something like that.
As Sandy was saying I don't think either group is the crazy one.

When you talked about the spirit of the disease possessing her that sounded about right.
Just going off on a mind wandering here.

Seeing both worlds as you do, there may just be a nudging. To take care of both sides of it.
On the one hand trust allopathic medicine to do what they can. On the other hand.
Do what you can energy wise to get the spirit of the disease to leave.

Thinking protectional herbs, tinctures and possibly spelling to understand what it wants and get it to leave?
But then..

Maybe I'm the crazy one.

With Love
Eelco


Good suggestions, thanks Eelco. I have been a bit down on myself through this ordeal, wondering if there is something I should have been doing magically or energetically that would have protected her from this. I go back and forth, because I know guilt is a program that runs on a loop and I do not want to own it even for a moment. Guilt is a waste of energy. But it does take a bit of constant awareness to keep that at bay. I have done some protections on/with her, because she works in an herb and tea shop. In a small town, the religious fanatics send negativity, the weirdos do....she gets all manner of energies and entities to deal with. We have been working with her, so that she will beef up her own protections every day. But once in a while, I still have to grab my broom and wand and head to town to clean up a mess someone left. Lol

I usually do not trust allopathic medicine, but in an emergency if I cannot get any other methods to work, I will utilize what is available. We were trying herbal remedies and whatnot, and she just kept getting worse. Anyway, we will most definitely create some tinctures and herbal concoctions together to get her well.

The spirit of the disease is difficult to speak of. I have felt, on occasion, that there was illness in my body somewhere but I was not sick. I recall a couple of times when family members had a respiratory illness, and I obviously did not. No cough, no sinus issues...but I felt a vibe running through my body. And I knew it was unfamiliar, and it did not belong. I saw different colors of energy running through me, like strings, and the illness seemed to be a different color than the others. And eventually, it would be gone. There is another possibility, as well...that someone sent her such negativity and darkness that it manifested as this bacteria...which then activated the virus...maybe I will talk about that later as well.

I do wish, sometimes, that someone in my life could help me figure out what this shit is.

Left to myself to figure it out, there is quite a bit of back and forth. This hand, and then that hand, and back. So...I could have been seeing or sensing the spirit of the illness. The illness could have very well presented as some sort of identity of its own. Em is very, very sensitive to just about everything energy, so that is a reasonable explanation. Problem is, so is every other explanation. Lol

As far as which group is the crazy one...I am not quite ready to address that one, I don't think.

Thank you for stopping and helping me to process. I appreciate it.
Do not fashion me a maiden who needs saving from the dragons. I am the Dragon. And I will eat you whole.

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Re: Crazy making

Postby Blue Rising » Wed Jun 28, 2017 1:48 pm

Sandy Clark wrote:Hi Blue Rising,

It is one of the scariest things to go through watching your child (does not seem to matter how old they get) struggle with a serious health concern and feel so helpless to fix it. Thoughts and good energy vibes coming your way.

One thing I'm sure you have thought of but maybe not>>>>has your daughter conjured up this illness unconsciously for unknown reasons as of yet? Sometimes it is good to look and see what life is like for them a little more than surface. I say this as I have a Granddaughter who is struggling with teenage Mono or Kissing Disease as they say.

She seems to just about get her energy back and then relapses not getting fully better even tho' she has had meds, lots of bed rest and down time. At the same time she is struggling with a major identity crisis. She appears to not be able to get a handle on this identity concern and thus needs NOT to be pushed to get moving and so keeps the maintenance of not being well; in tow;>>> possibly??

Just some food for thought along with well wishes and good health for one and all, and to save a little stress>>>>sooner than later. ;)


Thank you so much, Sandy! I appreciate the well wishes, good thoughts, healing vibes, and anything else of a positive nature!

Yes, you bring up an interesting question...did she manifest this illness for some reason? Oddly, that thought has crossed my mind. While in the middle of something like this, it is all I can do to get through it. But there are moments I try to pull back and find a bigger picture. She is the one, actually, that said that when we get really, really sick - enough to be laid in bed for awhile - it is Universe's way of telling us to stop and take a breather. She said something like this is meant to put into perspective all the little shit we stress over every day. (She has had trouble with anxiety.) Wise.

There is likely more to it, though. As Universe has typically done in my life, there are lots of lessons or lots of messages for everyone involved...many layers. So we will keep digging.

It is also hard to get at the painful lessons closest to home. It may take a little distance, or a little time, to see what we are all supposed to see from this.

Bless your granddaughter's heart. Sometimes things are just rough. Identity is so basic to how we view the world...and it is hard to shed that false identity (the one we are all sharing from on forums lol) when we are adults and have a better understanding of why this is necessary...much less a young person who is living the very identity they don't understand, maybe don't fit with. And I don't know if she is a teenager, but from my experience those pre-teen and teen energies are damned powerful. Hard for them to maneuver, hard for those around them.

Yeah....it is truly a challenge to maintain a sense of inner peace when someone close to me is having a rough time... I don't see it getting easier, but it would sure be nice if it would. Lol

Much Love to you, thanks for the input :)
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Re: Crazy making

Postby Christine » Wed Jun 28, 2017 2:02 pm

Blue ... I haven't known what to write or what I could add to this scary and challenging situation with your daughter. You know that we are in the same field so sending prayers of strength and love all ways.

I have tried to tune in from the distance and sense that Em is actually in a deep release process, the bacterial infection the trigger for a deeper miasma that needs to surface for integration and healing. Of course this is physical, emotional and spiritual, your daughter is strong and will come through stronger. I don't know if you have a good Homeopathic physician available in your area, viruses are like keys and can provoke a strong immune building response if treated homeopathically.

Whenever you have a chance let's talk ... thoughts flowing here that are best spoken in the fluidity of speech.
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Re: Crazy making

Postby Blue Rising » Wed Jun 28, 2017 2:13 pm

Christine wrote:Blue ... I haven't known what to write or what I could add to this scary and challenging situation with your daughter. You know that we are in the same field so sending prayers of strength and love all ways.

I have tried to tune in from the distance and sense that Em is actually in a deep release process, the bacterial infection the trigger for a deeper miasma that needs to surface for integration and healing. Of course this is physical, emotional and spiritual, your daughter is strong and will come through stronger. I don't know if you have a good Homeopathic physician available in your area, viruses are like keys and can provoke a strong immune building response if treated homeopathically.

Whenever you have a chance let's talk ... thoughts flowing here that are best spoken in the fluidity of speech.


Thank you. I understand what you mean, and yes please, let's do. M, Em's older sister, has strep now. As of yesterday. So, I am babysitting, and nursemaiding, and...well...I'm a little threadbare. So...I will carve out some time as soon as I can. It is probably important to talk, I know the energetics are smoother...and words don't get in the way as much.

<3
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