On the Journey...
Posted: Sun Jan 24, 2016 7:27 pm
I am reluctant, but I am relenting. I have received what I will call encouragement to open up a space to share my musings. It is beyond me how I have touched so many with my words in recent years. I am honored and humbled by those who have reached out to me to express that something I have shared has been inspiring, or encouraging, or otherwise has touched them. I have no idea how this is going to go, haha. I will probably share sporadically, as usual. And Lord only knows what will end up in this space. It is quite unnerving for me to open up a space, so I will begin here. Not quite publicly, but at the same time it is quite public for me. Things occur to me sometimes, they burn inside until I let them spill out. That's how this works for me. For example, this happened yesterday, and felt compelled to let it out. I will bring it here.
As I opened the window shades this morning, I realized what a symbolic movement that is. Each day I make a decision whether to do this, usually I open them. And as I stand there, three levels to peel back, I realize what a magical and symbolic gesture this is. That is actually three decisions, three gestures, or a potent decision in three movements. Each one takes time and patience, because of the way everything is rigged to work around here. First pushing aside the curtains, very gently or they will fall. Then the first shade which provides enough darkness, and when open provides light, en"light"ening the space. Then the third, which is a shield from the external, insulating the room from the extreme temperature. But as I rolled the third shade, I realized that this last movement is the removal of a final barrier.
As I roll the third shade and pin it in place, I feel warmth. I finally see the sun in all its beautiful consciousness. I feel it, its warmth radiating in through me. I place my hands on the window, which by looking at the thermometer I see should be cold, and it is warm instead. I hold my hands to the thin glass. My palms are outward, a sign of openness to receive. And I do, indeed, receive.
I open my eyes and I see that the sun is shining, but I do not see the warmth. I watch the stillness on the other side of the window, symbolic of the veil that gives the illusion of separateness, yet with my hands pressed against it in a hungry need for connection I absorb the energy of the sun. I am a rose.
I am aware that inside I am empty. Empty in the sense that while I contain flesh, and there is blood flowing through me, at the same time there is nothing inside. The body is a shell, and the shell disappears, and through it all flows a limitless vast potential waiting to be manifest.
Here I sit. Grateful for the growth I have experienced...so much growth, and at the same time I understand that I understand nothing.
Inhaling the Sun, as it exists through me and into the Earth. And exhaling the Earth, which is also exhaling the Sun.....
Grateful, I Am.
Tentatively, but with Much Love,
As I opened the window shades this morning, I realized what a symbolic movement that is. Each day I make a decision whether to do this, usually I open them. And as I stand there, three levels to peel back, I realize what a magical and symbolic gesture this is. That is actually three decisions, three gestures, or a potent decision in three movements. Each one takes time and patience, because of the way everything is rigged to work around here. First pushing aside the curtains, very gently or they will fall. Then the first shade which provides enough darkness, and when open provides light, en"light"ening the space. Then the third, which is a shield from the external, insulating the room from the extreme temperature. But as I rolled the third shade, I realized that this last movement is the removal of a final barrier.
As I roll the third shade and pin it in place, I feel warmth. I finally see the sun in all its beautiful consciousness. I feel it, its warmth radiating in through me. I place my hands on the window, which by looking at the thermometer I see should be cold, and it is warm instead. I hold my hands to the thin glass. My palms are outward, a sign of openness to receive. And I do, indeed, receive.
I open my eyes and I see that the sun is shining, but I do not see the warmth. I watch the stillness on the other side of the window, symbolic of the veil that gives the illusion of separateness, yet with my hands pressed against it in a hungry need for connection I absorb the energy of the sun. I am a rose.
I am aware that inside I am empty. Empty in the sense that while I contain flesh, and there is blood flowing through me, at the same time there is nothing inside. The body is a shell, and the shell disappears, and through it all flows a limitless vast potential waiting to be manifest.
Here I sit. Grateful for the growth I have experienced...so much growth, and at the same time I understand that I understand nothing.
Inhaling the Sun, as it exists through me and into the Earth. And exhaling the Earth, which is also exhaling the Sun.....
Grateful, I Am.
Tentatively, but with Much Love,