On the Journey...

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Blue Rising
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Re: On the Journey...

Post by Blue Rising »

So, in the end it is all learning, I suppose. The dream of driving a car straight into a brick wall did, indeed, become more clear... as I ran into a bit of an energetic messy bit. Ah, but...you know what they say.

[youtube]https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SiLadvl-VQo[/youtube]

Okay, they don't technically say all that. They just say Life Goes On. But it is more fun to sing it.

Actually, they also say what doesn't kill you makes you stronger. Jury is still out on that one, but I have to say I get stronger all the time. So maybe that one is true also :)

Much Love,
Do not fashion me a maiden who needs saving from the dragons. I am the Dragon. And I will eat you whole.
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Blue Rising
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Re: On the Journey...

Post by Blue Rising »

Gosh. I feel so grateful. Thank you for the support I am receiving. It's okay that it isn't in this thread. I'm still grateful. Messages coming in that are so amazing, I am grateful to Universe for offering them, I am grateful for the messengers, and I am grateful I am seeing them.

I was talking to a friend last night about shit that gets sent our way. The external shit. How thoughts are energy, and whether or not they necessarily hit their intended targets. I think yes. I think that pulling up an image of someone, or a thought of someone, and concentrating intent on a thought about that person, will actually send energy to that person. So I am very careful about what I think.

She, however, thinks that the thoughts thrown at us will not stick if they are of a lower vibration than we are. If we can raise our vibrations to a certain level, unknown what that is I guess, nothing negative can stick.

Well, that got me to thinking. Because, does that mean, then, that someone who conjures up and aims a hex won't even have an effect on the intended recipient, if they are of "high" vibration?

I just don't know about that. I will have to ponder this.

Well, and then add in whatever natural protection we have. Some say guardian angels, some say spirit guides...whoever they are. I have thought, in the past, that only what our own Higher Guidance system will allow to get through, will get through. So anything that does get through will teach us something, if we allow it to be a teacher.

Sorry, got off on a tangent. Sharing random thoughts, as usual.

Much Love,
Do not fashion me a maiden who needs saving from the dragons. I am the Dragon. And I will eat you whole.
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Blue Rising
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Re: On the Journey...

Post by Blue Rising »

A typical ramble.

I am feeling a busting out of sorts.

I found something quite by accident. And I know damned well it was not by accident. I found a forum I joined in 2011. I had totally and completely forgotten I had joined there. It brought back memories of what I was going through, back then.

Sometimes I see people online say, "I had my awakening back in .... blah-blah year." And I could not remember if there was a precipitating event, or a month, or a year, when this all started for me. I do know that joining the one place where I've been since Dec of 2011 was the main thrust of growth and learning. I see that I joined this other place, the one I found last night, only three months prior to that.

So maybe that was the beginning for me, 2011. I look back and see things now so much differently. Differently even than when I was going through them. Say...events of 2009. Or 2007. Today, as I sit here looking at this, I think every moment is an awakening of sorts. Every day things can be examined and dropped, or released since that is the buzzword. Yet every day I do struggle with some of the same things I struggled with all my life. Well, this life...I wonder how much of the struggles of this life have carried over from others. I digress.

I have been 1inMany for over four years. And either 1inMany is going to have to bust out and do some changing, or I am going to have to bust out and do some changing. The username itself if constricting me, it feels like I am choking. I have expressed so many aspects of my personal life, in a specific way, and it has been absolutely sincere and genuine. But, it seems to me that 1inMany limits the way I communicate. The way I think. Other people's expectations of me, and sometimes even my own expectations of me.

It's like this. In real life I have sisters, brothers, aunts and uncles, nieces and nephews...I have children and grandchildren. I have had lovers, husbands (yes, plural), friends...I have been an adult student, a teacher and had numerous other identities in multiple professions.

Being known as 1inMany online is like being known as "Mom" by every single person who knows me in my personal life. I am more that "just" Mom. That name, should I be known by only "Mom," would limit my expression and my growth.

Ha - here is a good example. As Mom, that one aspect of me, I would never say to one of my children, "Oh, fuck you!" But as a person, I have said this to someone and meant it. As "Sissy" (as I am known to several siblings and even nieces and nephews), I would indeed say "fuck you" but it would be in a very teasing and humorous way, and would have a completely different connotation.

Have I been pretending for four years, as 1inMany? Absolutely not. Am I pretending as Mom? Absolutely not. But no one name, or nickname, or username, could possibly encompass all that I am. Not one.

[youtube]https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=eAjNVKtQHAY[/youtube]

Word.
Do not fashion me a maiden who needs saving from the dragons. I am the Dragon. And I will eat you whole.
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Re: On the Journey...

Post by Blue Rising »

Anyone who reads this and does not understand it, to you I say...I also have difficulty relating sometimes when words bubble forth from anyone who speaks in phrases that sound like some sort of code for which I do not have the key. I know.

Anyone who reads this and feels it, thank you.

Exhale.

I want to approach Mother Kali, appease her. Kali, within, burns. The flames consume, much like she consumes her own children. I swear to you, I feel this to my very being. Peace, my Kali. Peace.

This can be a metaphor, you know. Eating her own children can be a metaphor for receiving back those whom she birthed. It is with love she does this, but as sure as I am sitting here, it is not the emotion of love. It is with no emotion. It is with the force of love. She appears terrifying, ugly even. Those who cannot see into her turn away in disgust. It is simply a cycle.

So at once I want to appease her. In the same space, I allow her burning and even enjoy it.

***

I had a dream last night that is becoming very clear. Holy crap. Something was taken from me. This happens from time to time. Every time something is taken from me, it is in answer to a plea. Usually a plea to Me...Remove That Which No Longer Serves! Remove the Block!

In the Moment of the Plea, it is like I implore All That Is. Then I let it go.

I think this has happened three times now. I usually wake up scared to death that something is taken out of me. And when it settles, it may take months for me to sit in a place of gratitude. But I do find the gratitude eventually.

Is it any coincidence that something was removed, and I am instantaneously in touch with Kali?

No.

Flames engulf. I will not only allow it but be grateful for it. I will also stay vigilant today, careful the flames do not kiss anyone in my personal life in a way that would burn unnecessarily. Steady as She goes.

Cripey.
Do not fashion me a maiden who needs saving from the dragons. I am the Dragon. And I will eat you whole.
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Blue Rising
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Re: On the Journey...

Post by Blue Rising »

[youtube]https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MOlZlXn0KT8[/youtube]

Shanti - Peace
Do not fashion me a maiden who needs saving from the dragons. I am the Dragon. And I will eat you whole.
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Re: On the Journey...

Post by Eelco »

And so the Many become 1 yet again !!!

How about Oncealot.

-hugs-

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Eelco
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Re: On the Journey...

Post by Moonlight »

Love it ! Welcome Blue Rising.

8-)
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Phil
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Re: On the Journey...

Post by Phil »

I thought the energetics of your name change would only be noticable to you...however I feel like I picked up a different energetic, nice move...hope it feels as good or freeing or whatever as it seems. Your friend, not-donk-here
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Re: On the Journey...

Post by Christine »

Image

This image says more than words can. So much love.
Image
The journey, the challenge is to step into the
projection room and stop being lost in the script.
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Re: On the Journey...

Post by Blue Rising »

Thanks, y'all. For helping make the break, and Eelco...and Phil...and Christine...and Moonlight...and those of you who follow these musings...pm's...emails... Every bit of that is encouragement, a support. Love to you all.

'Tis a public transformation I have gone through. And continues to be so. I guess until it no longer is.

Yes, I did not expect to feel such an energetic shift, but I sure do. It feels like my shoes got too small and I bought a bigger pair :) Did I just make room for even more High Weirdness? Haha!

Ahhhhhh.
Do not fashion me a maiden who needs saving from the dragons. I am the Dragon. And I will eat you whole.
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