Thoughts, thoughts, too many thoughts...

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Spiritwind
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Re: Thoughts, thoughts, too many thoughts...

Post by Spiritwind »

I mentioned something about intuition in another post I made over in the This Week in Review thread, and I’m going to expand on what I mean by intuition. And, just basically blab on with my many thoughts I am having. Hardly any body reads here, anyway, so what the heck. I’m writing for myself, and that’s ok.

For me, the force, the field, the energy, source, Great Spirit, God, Goddess, and that which goes beyond names, is very real. And I can tell you what it is NOT. It does not use fear, it does not lie, it IS benevolent, and exudes peace, empathy, and so many other things I could go on and on. It is bright, nurturing, and literally is the juice, the life force that animates every living thing. It is not somewhere else, I don’t have to pay for it, other than with my attention, and I don’t need to search for it at all. It’s not in a book, video, class, or workshop. It, in a very literal way, is everywhere and everything in nature, starting with my physical body. It is very creative, intelligent, accessible, and aware. It can be communicated with, once you identify the signature, the frequency, which allows you to be “in the zone”, much like dialing in a channel on the radio or TV used to be.

And one of the ways I became so intimately connected to this frequency, was when I really started to listen to my intuition. And my intuition would sometimes urge me to act in a way that from appearances seemed counter-intuitive. But I discovered after playing around with this inner voice, not sure if I could trust it, or even being sure where it originated from, that following it’s admonitions never in retrospect was a bad move, in fact, quite the contrary. It has always been accompanied by some impressive synchronicities, and far reaching benefits that often come from taking a different path.

My early programming which I allowed to guide my earlier life always engaged me in relationships that were very toxic, dysfunctional, and even sometimes dangerous. It’s what I was used to, from birth. I would have never worked my way out of that, had I NOT learned to listen to a different voice. Even though I don’t fault anyone who is involved with any of the 12 step programs for life, I have moved well past what it had to offer. The one thing, though, that it teaches that is paramount, is that there IS a higher power, that goes beyond belief, and when you realized that you were powerless, you could call on it to assist you, and it would be there.

This is a vital truth, from my own personal experience. It doesn’t matter what name you use, whether you are religious or not. It’s whether you have developed this deep inner relationship with this guiding force. This is why it is hard for me to see people either on the one hand saying there is no god, no need for awareness of the spirit. In fact, many believe we really are just an accident descended from apes, and the whole Darwinian survival of the fittest crap. Might makes right, the strongest rise to the top.

And then I see the other side still adhering to the “you are a sinner” from birth, tainted from the get go, and still 100% in support of this angry, genocidal, woman hating, jealous god. They often don’t even see the programming, how it runs them. So many I personally know see the satanic agenda, see the dark times coming, understand the depth of lies we’ve been programmed with all our lives, and do believe it’s a spiritual war. All of which I can agree with. But then it stops there. They, too, have made themselves judges and juries to anyone who is not like them. What really happened to “freedom”? Because their ideal is no less full of self righteous platitudes as those who go to the other extreme and tell us anything should be permissible, or you’re politically incorrect, such as full term abortions being ok, or you’re against abortion. Or, if you don’t support an agenda that encourages one to think they could, and should, spend serious time thinking as a 5 year old about what sex they want to be and being taught that men can have babies, then you are somehow homophobic.

And the meanness on both sides when it comes to the vaccine agenda et all, does not put either side in a good light. I don’t want to make fun of people who did take these experimental injections, even though my personal “intuition” from the get go told me it’s a no go for me. And I don’t really want to speculate too much about what the future death rate is going to be, not only from what has gone on the last two years that goes way beyond whether you got the jab or not. The point is, it has become obvious to me that someone very powerful indeed is taking the message on the Georgia Guidestones very seriously. Whether it goes that way, and in exactly in what manner and time frame is like watching dice in motion at a crap shoot. With nature involved, no matter who paid who to throw the game, there is always an element of risk, upset, and surprise.

And what I mean by nature involved, I mean that something that is connected to my inner highway, called intuition, to that which is divine. To a power and intelligence that is greater than that which I possess when only relying on my ego and sense of self in the smaller sense. For really, it does come down to this.

When I allow my conscious self to exclude this voice, I generally am guided by group think, media propaganda, childhood societal and religious programming, and so on. It is all very toxic and dysfunctional, and cannot even withstand much inner contemplation before beginning to disintegrate and fall apart. It does not hold up well to objective inner analysis. So I can’t ever go back there, to the way I was. It would be too painful, as my eyes have been opened, and I can’t unsee what I now see. Am I now a threat? I don’t want to hurt anyone, punish anyone, make them be like me. I’m not starting a religion or political movement, and any kind of counter insurgency, other than to support creating a system to obtain food and seeds to grow more from each other before we can’t buy them at the store anymore. Yes, I am guilty of that.

All I can say is it’s not looking good. I’m hoping nature really does have a wildcard up her sleeve. Yes, creation is a product of both polarities, male, female, but in my world, only females give birth and carry young in their womb. In my years of raising goats, and getting to know many livestock owners, though I’ve seen one hermaphrodite goat who mostly appeared female, I’ve never seen a male get pregnant or give birth, nor have I heard of anyone else who has either. Same with humans. I’ve known gay and bisexual people, and other than their sexual preference, they were like everyone else, and as far as I know never had a problem with what bathroom to go to. What’s going on now is something else entirely. It is an attempt to completely reprogram our social mores, and it’s kind of whether the majority really support it or not. Doesn’t sound very democratic to me. But, whatever. I’m just a country bumpkin in backwoods rural America still musing over how much those who wrote the Bill of Rights, however imperfect they were as beings, must be rolling over in their graves today. I don’t think this is what they envisioned, whether they were all Masons or not. Ok, end of rant for now.
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Re: Thoughts, thoughts, too many thoughts...

Post by Spiritwind »

Woke up at 5:30 am to see my husband laying next to me wide awake, which is unusual. He was worrying about the refrigerator in our other RV. It truly is ALWAYS something to worry about and fix here, one thing after another. Then he gets up and checks the news. Why he does that I don’t know. I skim headlines and that’s all I can take. I told him we ought to take up fishing. Come up with some kind of non-alcoholic beverage and some healthy snacks of some sort, and just go sit out in the middle of a lake somewhere.

He was reading about Pelosi’s husband and the big shove all the facts under the rug move there, then moved onto the Uvalde school shooting and how there was no response for a full hour, with parents being tased and restrained from rescuing their own children. I skimmed some other headlines in some of the alternative news sites I keep up on, to see another big fire, this time an egg production facility in Wright County, Minnesota. There was another fire just a few days ago in Prosser, Washington, a 100 year old grain silo, too, that burned to the ground. Then there was the lovely clip of Bill Gates claiming the next plandemic will likely be caused by man made climate change or a bio-terrorist. I almost laughed on that one, because it’s strangely true. It will be caused by man, and will be ANOTHER act of bio-terrorism.

Which brings me to my visit with the grandsons this weekend. The older one, who is almost 15, is quite frequently taken aback by my stance on things, as it is so different than the mainstream view. We were talking about the jab he was forced to get, twice, and how everyone he knows, his mom and step-dad, teachers, fellow students etc. who have had all the jabs, and are still getting sick and being tested all the time, and keep supposedly having co-Vid. It doesn’t make sense to him, nor should it with anyone who still has active working brain cells. Then somehow Bill Gates name came up, and he started laughing when I told him how much I despised the creator of Microsoft! And Jeff Bezos, Mark Zuckerberg, and Fowchi. Yes, I’m misspelling his name on purpose. As far as I’m concerned, they are all working against humanities best interests and are enemies of the people. There are many more names I could add to the list.

We talked about how taking everyone’s guns away is only going to leave good people unarmed and unable to defend themselves, against those who intend to harm, and about what has actually happened in many countries who have done this. I won’t list them, but again, it’s not rocket science to see that the criminals will still have them, and so will the growing army of those who will be tasked to take them away from the rest of us. WHO you might ask? And how come the individual who sold these weapons to the guy who was allowed to go kill a bunch of school children isn’t being held accountable? Or anyone else, for that matter, like all the officers who just listened to school children being shot and killed while they stood and did nothing.

And you don’t even want to get me started on what I think about our current administration. We must be the laughing stock of the world, though I would have to say it’s almost a tie with Canada. Just a few of this morning musings as I drink my coffee and contemplate the day ahead. I keep writing here, again, even though I’m the lone poster, again, because I sincerely think we are going through a worldwide situation of shock, and depression, to the point where many are just kind of withdrawing into themselves. I got off Facebook, and generally don’t watch the news, yet you can’t get away from it. People I know right here close to home who were so involved in solutions oriented activities last year, are hiding out. But there is no escaping what is rolling our collective way. For me, it’s like I’ve been through this crap before, in more than one lifetime. I really didn’t want to be here again for this kind of reality nightmare unfolding in sort of a slow, yet fast, motion, on the world screen of life.

Yet, here I am. I have someone coming to get some of my wild black cap raspberry starts today, and someone coming to look at baby goats I have for sale. I need to get busy and make kimchi, dehydrate bananas, get the gardens planted, and, well, the list in my head just keeps growing, so I think I’ll stop there. I am here, I am alive, and I just got to keep going. What a show, and I hate horror movies. Oh well, I’ll just involve myself in some of the side plots and story lines, keep my hands in the dirt, my feet on the ground, and my head on my inner knowing that I have a friend in the unseen realms who has never let me down and is always right here, just on a different frequency. I will find joy in listening to the birds chirp, and the goats doing what they do, the plants growing, and turn what I can’t control over to something bigger than myself. Life is good.
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Re: Thoughts, thoughts, too many thoughts...

Post by Spiritwind »

I hear the sound of baby goats outside, who want me to hurry up and let them out to go be with their moms. And I know I should be springing into action, but don’t feel springy. I feel a great deal of turmoil about life lately, and find it hard to focus my attention. There is a huge convergence taking place, with storm fronts on both the personal and universal level. I know I need to be fearless, but have not worked through my own triggers having to do with loss.

No small matter, really. I’ve gained many good friends this last couple of years, yet see so many also struggling with life. Withdrawal and severe depression has taken a few out of the scene entirely. And as far as triggers go, I’ve also lost some friends who have far more hidden triggers than I even do. They are only hidden to themselves, as they are quite transparent to those who know them. It makes me sad, and though I need to bolster myself for even more loss to come, I wonder if I can find it within myself to do so.

I may have to downsize more on goats, and can’t help but worry about their fates, as I struggle with the fact that so many other farmers are also having to face the lack of adequate food and finances to keep going. So many animals are going to face the execution squad, and be taken to auction, and when I look into their eyes I feel great pain, knowing this could all have been avoided, and that this crisis has been created on purpose. It reminds me of a dream I had about 30 years ago, that left me shaken for weeks. In it I was standing in a huge herd of buffalo, that were milling around grazing. I could hear and feel their hot breath, and it was a most awesome sight. It was like I was really there. As I was taking it all in I could hear drumming and a man speak in the background, talking to me about what was to come. The scene then abruptly changed, to one of stinking carcasses all around, as all the buffalo as far as my eyes could see were laying dead all around me. It shook me deeply, as I listened to the voice explain to me that what was done to these buffalo, the mentality behind it, is still very much alive today. They were slaughtered on purpose, mainly to break the will of the people who relied on them for their livelihood. They had been an integral part of their lives, and now they were gone. It wasn’t just the loss that hurt, it was the wanton disregard for life and lack of honor that was demonstrated that broke their hearts.

I’ve quoted him many times, but will repeat it again. As Russel Means said in a video I watched of him, “we’re all on the reservation now”. Truer words could not be spoken. It’s like we’ve been allowed to free range for long enough that we believed that we were our own masters, but now we’re being rounded up for auction ourselves. It doesn’t leave me with a warm comfy feeling.

We really are under attack, yet just like the eagle that picks off one duck at a time, while the rest are swimming ignorantly and blissfully all around, there is no alarm being sounded, nor a mass movement out of harms way. Yes, there are those of us who can clearly see the emperor has no clothes and are doing our best to get the word out, yet we have been drowned out by the even louder sounds of endless and generally meaningless distraction. When do you quit trying to tell others the building is on fire, and choose to leave them to their fates to at least save yourself?

I’m attending a Freedom Rally tomorrow, where our little group of rebels will be having our market. There will be speakers from various churches, along with music and a march through downtown. I worry that it will be presented in the local media as a bunch of far right wing Christians who are tied to racist, anti abortion, anti LGBTQ, anti vaccine nutters who are “dangerous”. I guess we are dangerous, in that we are voicing opposition, and they want us to just shut up and willingly and quietly go along with the plan for our eradication. Thing is, since we are mostly white, we automatically get accused of being racist. And they skip the fact that abortion laws have been changing to allow full term fully viable infants to be murdered, which is a far cry from a woman’s right to end a pregnancy in the first three months. They also forget to mention that most folks were perfectly willing to allow people to chose their own lifestyle, up to the point where it was being shoved down our children’s throat in school, in a clear attempt to completely change long standing social mores in regards to sexual preferences. Drag queen story hour is not teaching kids non-discrimination. It’s teaching them to embrace it as something cool, and progressive.

Encouraging elementary children to choose their sex like a person chooses what clothes to wear is not something acceptable to even the majority of the population. It’s being chosen for us. The recent Pride in the Park event that was held locally demonstrated all that is wrong with this agenda. One of the performers chose to completely expose himself, and yes, he had all the male parts it would normally be illegal to be showing to a crowd of parents and children. The looks on some of the kids faces clearly showed their shock and dismay. And now, anyone who chooses not to take the experimental jab, or refuses to also make their children comply, are seen as anti-vaxxers, even though many of them didn’t have a problem with the previous vaccines that went through vigorous testing for years to be approved.

So, we’re all being lumped together, in an attempt to sway the remaining public’s perceptions about those of us who do see where the narrative is really heading, and are trying to bring awareness to those who remain asleep. It’s easy to off your opponent, if you first drug them so they cannot respond. And that’s happening in so many ways, through actual medication, through our food, through whatever they are spraying on us in our skies, and especially through what they spew out via government sanctioned media outlets. Pretty much anyone who speaks out that hasn’t received the government’s stamp of approval, gets vilified, even if it’s mostly made up bull shit.

What a deal. But I’m going anyway. I just hope they don’t spray us with something, as I keep hearing reports that after some public events people are sharing various observations that hint at something more going on. Burning sensations in their eyes and throat, dizziness, a metallic taste in their mouth, and deep fatigue. Yes, we really are at war. A war by stealth, but a war nonetheless. Ok, I guess I’ve gotten what really troubles me off my chest for the day so I’ll now eat my carrot cake and then get busy. Hi Ho, Hi Ho, it’s off to work I go.... (By the way, the kimchi turned out great!)
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Re: Thoughts, thoughts, too many thoughts...

Post by Spiritwind »

Good morning world. I had a horrible day yesterday, for reasons beyond my conscious understanding. But I am not going to have a horrible day today. Since part of the problem seemed to originate from the fact I could not sleep the night before, despite eating a few fresh skullcap leaves, I decided to just call it a day early, to ensure I got plenty of sleep, even if I did my usual of waking up about every hour with a hot flash. It seemed to work, as I am now well rested, even though I feel seriously behind in farm duties.

But the key thing I have noticed is how important my attitude is, in righting the upturned ship again, and get back on course. I do know that being the solstice, those black magicians who work for our eugenicist keepers were probably feverishly busy doing their rituals, and I have noticed that for some very nebulous reason I seem to feel the dark energy emitted from them. I will not back down or give up though, and will continue to work my own form of magic that runs counter to the narrative they are creating for humanity. It’s part of why I am here, along with countless others like myself who are doing much the same thing.

And, I am to the point where people who judge me, make fun of me, talk bad about me, and have decided they don’t want to know me because they think I’m an arrogant fraud can throw their barbed arrows all they want, and they will just bounce off of me. I had someone recently tell me I can’t be trusted in business dealings and that I have claimed to be a psychic. Funny thing is, the business deal that went awry was a total breakdown in communication due to the other party being heavily triggered, and my intentions completely misread. Since this person has serious trauma issues from a lifetime of abandonment and life threatening health problems from youth, I cannot even be upset really, as my heart goes out to him, but I can’t fix it either. As far as being a psychic, it’s also really funny, as all along I have always said the same thing, to anyone who will listen. And that is that we ALL have the capacity to be telepathic and read energy fields. Every single one of us. It’s hard wired in.

You can’t work with things like Reiki for almost 30 years and not know that everyone has a field of energy around them. Plus, it has been shown through remote viewing that pretty much everyone has the capacity to travel in the unseen realms to look at things and obtain information. So I am not going to apologize to anyone for having discovered that I too have and can expand on this natural ability. Another funny thing about this most recent experience with the person mentioned above, is that both him and his father absolutely have this ability themselves as well, but have not focused on developing it, or learning to trust what they receive (a common problem). And they can both just get in line with all the other haters in my club. I have withdrawn my energy from the relationship, and will simply continue on the trajectory I have already set for myself. I’m in it for the long haul, however long I am here in this body.

I generally look at the headlines in my telegram chats every morning, just to get a feel of what information is floating around out there, and it’s not pretty. Between the everlasting Covid narrative with infants now up for grabs on the hit list, the fiasco we call politics and all it’s machinations, as well as the free fall of our food production and distribution networks, it’s looking darker by the day. I’m feeling it here in that the little bit of corn I planted is looking pretty sad, and is unlikely to produce much of anything. I knew that at the outset, but thought I would try anyway just to see. Fortunately, some other things I planted don’t require the warmth corn needs to grow and looks to be doing well. Should get a pretty good crop of potatoes. And I’m currently swimming in goats milk, but I’ll save all my farm talk for another thread. All I can do is move into solutions. Worrying about the problem only energizes it to continue.

The last thing I will mention before jumping out the door is the new vendor agreement the board members of my nearby Grange have come up with for the little Farmers Market I started out here. I’m half way through the season, which was only once a month through September, and they have now come up with a lengthy detailed and very formal vendors agreement, to supposedly cover themselves from every conceivable liability issue, as well as dictating even how we should dress. I will probably sign it, and finish out my obligation. At the end of the season I will then inform them that although they worked hard to put that together, they will have to find someone else to carry the torch next year. I will withdraw my participation in favor of our unregulated, rule free, underground alternative economy networks. Each person in these growing networks takes responsibility for themselves, and knows that the system has now fully turned against the people it is supposed to be representing and protecting. We have collectively withdrawn our support of this system, and have created our own.

It’s all a learning experience, so no time wasted. For those who wish to continue to support the crumbling infrastructure of our federally regulated everything, have at it. I’m not going to follow that sinking ship. I wish them well. Soon enough we will all be able to clearly see that life as we knew it is over. There is no going back. There has always been a portion of the population that completely turns feral and manages to survive these many resets. I plan to be part of that group. Even though it looks bleak on the collective horizon, I will not give up or give in, nor will I comply with their attempts to off me. On that note, I will bid you adieu. I have much to do.

By the way, good to see you LostNFound!!!!
I see your love shining out from my furry friends faces, when I look into their eyes. I see you in the flower’s smile, the rainbow, and the wind in the trees....
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Re: Thoughts, thoughts, too many thoughts...

Post by Spiritwind »

Tomorrow is Independence Day here in the US, and I truly wonder at the many who celebrate, but don’t have a clue what it really means, nor would they be willing to stand as our forefathers and mothers did, to maintain that freedom, which includes freedom of speech, right to assemble, and the right to bear arms to defend against an increasing tyrannical government.

I was going to write a farm life post, but I can already see my mind is elsewhere. It’s been very interesting for me to observe the separation along the lines of personal ideologies taking place, and I marvel that it should have to do with the underlying reason we have had the personal freedoms we have mostly enjoyed here in the US, since the revolution that took place almost 250 years ago. I had no idea that the majority of people could just as easily live in China, as long as they can keep their sports, lattes, and drag queen story hour going. It’s the strangest thing I’ve ever seen.

Pretty bizarre to see the disconnect, believing it’s ok to force everyone to limit their oxygen intake for over two years. Even though mask mandates have been lifted, people are already starting, or never stopped, masking up in the expectation there is still great danger all around. Actually there is, but of an entirely different sort. They also believe that it’s ok to force experimental injections on everyone, regardless of whether the risks outweighs the benefits, in a form of medical tyranny. And it’s done nothing to stop them from getting ill and testing positive over and over again (we’ll leave out the fact that the tests have proven completely ineffective anyway), while from what I can see the still feral population is remaining remarkably healthy.

Yet, in contrast, these same people who stand in support of all this (in the name of public health) are all up in arms (no, wait, we’re supposed to give those up too!) over the right to abortions being taken away at the federal level, even though it’s being used to support and encourage the growing and very profitable body parts industry. This has grown up over the increasing lax abortion laws that now allow pretty much full term viable fetuses to be murdered. Even though I used to support a woman having a right to end a pregnancy in the first 12 weeks, I do not support this. My own grandson was born 3 months early, and is a smart, funny, and precious almost 8 year old now. The thought that he could have been not only taken alive, but then had parts removed to sell to the highest bidder, and then killed troubles me deeply, that we have fallen so far in consciousness to ever think that was ok.

I have done a fair amount of genealogy research, and do have a relative that came over on the Mayflower in 1620. His family were Pilgrims, which was different than the later Puritans who arrived, and even though it turns out they weren’t very evolved in their thinking, and did a very poor job of extending those same rights they thought they should be entitled to to the indigenous people who were already here, they did make the perilous trip to maintain the right to engage in religious activities and beliefs that were being denied in their countries of origin. That is what this country was founded on. And many have immigrated here ever since, to escape oppressive and tyrannical governments. We have held ourselves up to the world as a beacon of life, liberty, and the pursuit of happiness. And now we have a serious erosion problem, where the support of those beliefs is in great danger of disappearing. The very Christian ideologies, however flawed they may be, are under attack, and those who push back in any public manner are being villainized and branded as domestic terrorists. How on earth did we come to this?

I know how. We have been duped, and cannot seem to even recognize how the idea that we are nothing more than chattel who only exist to support the state has crept in. In other words, we are entitled to no natural rights, other than those granted by said State, and our value as individuals is nil. I don’t know how you feel about that, but I know how I do. I realize once we are born, and our parents obtain a birth certificate, we are basically no different than a car that the state has title to. But I never agreed or understood that until later in life. And according to my convictions, only my creator has any rights to me, and they, the State, did NOT create me. Sacred law trumps mans laws, and I am now definitely at odds with the status quo. So I cannot join in celebrating what is fast disappearing and drink to our liberty while shooting off fireworks.

Here is a couple websites on Marxism, in case you need a refresher.
https://www.heritage.org/progressivism/ ... ie-marxism
https://whorulesamerica.ucsc.edu/theory/marxism.html

And the following two links show the stark contrast between what they want you to think about the so called 3 percenters, and what they actually have to say about themselves.
https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Three_Percenters
https://www.3percenters.org/about-us

Oh yeah, by the way, enjoy the 4th!
I see your love shining out from my furry friends faces, when I look into their eyes. I see you in the flower’s smile, the rainbow, and the wind in the trees....
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Re: Thoughts, thoughts, too many thoughts...

Post by LostNFound »

And the world went insane, or more insane that it was. As you say, do people even understand what the 4th of July stands for other than sports games on the big screen tv, hotdogs, hamburgers (human meat at McDonald's), back yard barbecues, lots of alcohol, beer, and of course, fireworks. In other words, a three or four day weekend off from their dreary slavery jobs created by the slave masters to drain their life's essence from cradle to grave.

Home alone and crying as witnessing this human destruction. As chattel-cattle, we are being eaten by ourselves, our children are being eaten and blood being drank in the name of selfish, sick, freakazoids that have been destroying the human race for a very long time. I feel we are on the cusp of this destruction, annihilation, and it seems that a major percentage of this human race is so asleep because of the brainwashing, it may be unstoppable.

Schitt.
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Re: Thoughts, thoughts, too many thoughts...

Post by Spiritwind »

I have a bit of a backlog of thoughts and emotions that need to be sorted out, so I’ll try writing them out and see where it goes. Can’t even get the forum to load for me for days now, and working the new job has left me little time and energy. At the moment I feel a deep underlying sense of anxiety and a bit of depression about pretty much most everything.

My life is not horrible by any means, but it feels like the speed has picked up even more with where we are collectively heading, and I feel distinctly unprepared. I have some rather serious dental issues that need to be taken care of, and the ability to make it happen is quite challenged. My son being here has opened the door to a whole new set of challenges that unfold on a regular basis. For one thing, the way the system works is about as ass backwards and fucked up as it can get. Much more I can say about that, but I’ll have to come back to it to keep the flow going here.

Right now I’ve been trying to sell the only buck I have left for over a month and nothing is happening. I just put the little doeling up for sale too, but no bites yet. I really don’t know if I even can afford to feed two more mouths during the long winter, but not into just throwing them to the wind by taking them to the lady who sells them pretty much all for meat. It weighs very heavy on me. I’ve kind of got it worked out for hay this winter, though my friend who is keeping her three goats here is wanting to try and get non-GMO alfalfa that is more organic, and that’s not going to be easy to do. Yes, there’s some farm life stuff mixed in here, but I’m likely to be all over the place so will put this in my too many thoughts thread. Interestingly, my friend talked to a local feed store owner, and he pointed to the fields they own behind their business. They do not use GMO roundup ready seeds, and their fields are still doing good 10-15 years later, and are not inundated with weeds. Those who use GMO seeds have to buy new seed every 2-3 years, plus have to spray heavily to keep the weeds from taking over. So they were all swindled, big time.

And that’s another thing that weighs heavy on my mind lately, is the extent to which we have all been lied to, pretty much across the whole spectrum of life here. Just going to the grocery store is a sobering experience. Overall there has been about a 30-50% increase in prices, with the exception of a few items that are still about the same. The same talking heads continue to spew out their bullshit, none of which you can believe. Yes, I’m in a swearing mood.

There’s the made up climate change narrative (not that’s it’s not changing, just not for the reasons they tell us), the covid/mask up/pandemic/jab/be afraid narrative, there’s the imminent war narrative, there’s the crumbling food production and distribution system that’s being engineered, and the escalating attempts to basically completely take over our lives, our bodies, and our minds, and even our understanding that we are spiritual beings.

Then there’s the transgender agenda. I’m trying to figure out why so many men want to be women now, and not so much the other way around. Is it a form of penis envy, but they want to keep their junk and have boobs too? I really don’t know. I guess I’m old fashioned, but neither my husband or I can understand this. You see, in my view, sex has very little to do with love. Love who you want, but it almost seems like a form of self hatred to want to not be what your soul chose for you in this lifetime. It has nothing to do with love. The energy emanating from those who are obviously in this deliberate state of confusion of the sexes camp does not feel healthy or whole. And I’m not talking about those who as an adult maybe go through a transformation to live as another sex because it truly feels the right choice for them. I’m sure there are those who do not regret having made the choice, and are truly happier as a result. But that’s not what I’m feeling in most cases. Having sex with children, and trying to normalize it and sexualize children from an early age does not benefit them at all, it simply paves the way for sex addicts to be able to legally satisfy their every desire with impunity. These people do not see procreation as a sacred act, which most spiritual belief systems understand it is. And this isn’t about procreation either. It’s predatory in every way, and any mother who has an ounce of real awareness of her humanity knows this. End of rant there.

Especially working at this semi rural grocery store with three nearby mobile home parks, I get to see a fairly good cross section of humanity. I would say about 1/3 buy all their food there, though the prices are considerably higher on most items than the bigger grocery stores, and have a state issued card to buy food. Which means they are supposedly low income, but many also spend a considerable amount of cash on cigarettes, beer, and hard alcohol, as well as our not so healthy selection of cheap deli food, all deep fried, and meat, lots of meat. Some do this almost everyday. The number of morbidly obese is kind of scary to observe as well. A fair number of crack heads and not so well put together mentally unstable folks among them too. I realize many of these people have had poverty, poor diets, and traumatized parents passing it on from generation to generation. There are the uncommon bright lights that come through the store, which is like a breath of fresh air, and always gratifying to see. They never even know that at least someone sees them as they truly are. I hope they manage to keep their lights on.

So, energetically the job is harder on me than I would have guessed. There are also the women that come in, clearly physically abused and trying to act normal. And often their openly hostile partners who clearly have no respect for anyone, even themselves. I won’t elaborate on my thoughts there, but I don’t get a warm fuzzy feeling towards them to put it mildly. I know I’ve had other lifetimes where this behavior was not well tolerated. Although I’ve worked in the general public before, after being on the farm this last 6 years, and being away from people, and then the last two years almost exclusively being around like minded freedom loving people who do question everything, the general public feels much more harsh than it used to. More, now than ever, I really do feel like I’m from somewhere else.

And I keep making the call, every day, to the Big Kahuna, the loving presence that permeates all life here, even those who dwell in darkness. This presence is what sustains me, and keeps me going, even though in a way, I feel like I don’t have much stake in this realm. If I can keep making a place for the indwelling spirit of life, creation itself, and allow it to fill me up from the inside out, I always feel renewed, humbled, grateful, and know that there is a purpose to everything. It helps me get out of my own way, as well as realizing how very little control I have over most everything, especially the show going on outside and around me. My day to day home life is full of love, and even beauty. Even though the goats really did a number on garden areas this year, I have a beautiful volunteer garden area I didn’t even plant growing down where the gray water comes out down the hill. Everything gets renewed, even life after destruction and chaos. It may take a while, but I’ve seen it happen time and time again. Just seeing things growing through cracks in the pavement illustrate life’s tenacity. Clearly, whatever is truly taking place in this realm is more than meets the casual eye.

It’s an odd thing to just feel it all, the good, the bad, and the ugly. I can say, intellectually, I understand, but emotionally it is a process. It feels to me like I’m looking a tremendously big wave, a tsunami of sorts, right square in the eye, and know that I must not resist. It’s going to hit us no matter what. It sort of reminds me of childbirth. When you’re in labor, there’s no getting out of it, making it go away, you just have to go through it. The more you tense up and resist, the more uncomfortable it is. Something new will come out of all of this, I just don’t know how it’s all going to go. Embracing the unknown is a repeating theme in my life, and trying to do it with a little bit of grace. That’s all I can do. And now, it must get ready to go to work in that chaotic field which I have mentioned, and hope that I have grounded myself enough to experience it while keeping the connection to command central open and clear of distortion, and let any discordant energy simply go around me. It’s important to not take it in. It isn’t mine. Just trying to keep my lights on.....

I might as well add a few words now that I have another day off and the forum is fixed so I can get on it to post. My son is most likely going to quit his job by the end of the week. He got a job at this brick making factory, and besides the fact that it’s very physical he could have kept with it, but then they are insisting that he works overtime and he already drives almost an hour and a half each way. Under those conditions he would have no life at all, so unless they work with him it’s going to end very soon. He got an accounting degree and actually enjoys calculus (seriously!!!), so he is definitely qualified for something else, not as physical and better paying. Just having got released after almost 6 years and not having work experience in that field isn’t helping though.

He has told me some about his time in the pokey, but not really sat down and just talked about it all yet. Thing is, I was actually spending the night 3 nights a week at his home watching my two grandsons while he worked the graveyard shift when the events that led to his incarceration were happening, so I know more than even the courts do, as they only have the girls testimony and the cell phones my son was letting them use. The attorney for him never even got to see all the evidence, nor did my son ever get his day in court. He had never had any interest in young girls prior to this, and had just recently been separated from his wife. The two girls in question were allowed by their parents to spend a lot of time at his home, eating his food, washing the families laundry there, and occasionally babysitting his kids. They were both also very sexually active even prior to this time, but the parents seemed quite uninterested and oblivious. The older one, almost 16, I knew since she was 6 when my husband and I managed the mobile home park they all lived in. I had already witnessed in her a high level of inappropriate behavior, and her ability to lie without batting an eye. I told my son they were going to lead to trouble, but I had no idea the extent of it. They even broke into his home when no one was there so they could hang out with impunity. There is more to the story, but it does irk me to see the people who monitor him now that he is out act like he was on the level of child predator, the type who would hangout at schools to case potential targets. That is simply not the truth.

I invited him to go with me to a rural friend’s home to pick up a couple gallons of milk last week, and her 12 year old daughter brought them out to the car and handed my son the milk through the open window without saying a word to him, and I found out even that is not ok. They are subjecting him to regular lie detector tests, and drug tests, which he has to pay for, and he told me that almost 90% of the inmates who are in there for similar type offenses end up back in prison, not because they reoffend, but because they can’t comply with the rigid probationary rules that often don’t have anything to do with the offense committed. He can’t drink alcohol, even though he has never been in any trouble with it, and can’t take his children to a park or even attend any sports events they might be involved in, and it doesn’t matter that his mom and step dad are with him and he doesn’t even leave our sight. It’s like they go out of their way to trip him up, and they talk to him like he is some horrible beyond redemption kind of person.

I could excuse their exuberance to keep the cases they are assigned from reoffending, if it truly was motivated by a desire to protect the public, but knowing what I know about the out of control pedophilia problem we have starting at the highest levels of society, and the fact that they never seem to be held accountable, I can’t quite find it genuine. The fact that Ghislaine Maxwell was found guilty, yet not one name of Jeffrey’s Epstein’s many clients has ever been revealed tells a different story. The problem is epidemic and endemic. And the people who gravitate towards these types of jobs for correctional institutions seem absolutely unable to think independently at all. They seem to enjoy the misery they are able to inflict as they play god in these men’s lives. If Erik says anything in his defense he is accused of making excuses and blaming the victim. No matter the truth of the matter, they want him to feel shame the rest of this life, and their goal seems to be to make sure he never forgets it. The message is “you’re a bad person, a blight on society, and you’re lucky we let you out at all”.

So much more I could say about it all, but I need to get busy. I have to say the upside is he gets to be far more involved in his two son’s lives, and they are definitely benefitting. It has given him a great deal of motivation to get through this trying time. Eventually, after he has made it through this first year where he has to do weekly treatment sessions as part of his probation, he will look at his options and maybe even move to another state. Washington State is quite harsh in what they are able to do, and the idea that it could be like this the rest of his life is not an exciting prospect. I also find it interesting that he has become much more reflective and even spiritually aware, and has chosen not to blame, be angry or become bitter. He realizes that at least on a personal level he does have a choice in how he responds, and it will impact the outcome. I just hope the frustration he feels from time to time doesn’t become too much as he deals with these seemingly soulless people. At least now he does feel a connection to the Big Kahuna I mention so often. For that I am very grateful, as he might just be able to find his way forward without a tragic ending, even if the odds are stacked against him.

I know I was all over the place, and I do have some repetitive themes in my posts, but at least I’m writing about real life, real people, and I can’t help that some of these reflections are repetitive because they just continue to be so in our faces. Some of the headline news, alternative as well as mainstream, is also very repetitive, with more shootings, more evidence coming to light about our would be controllers, yet nothing ever happens to them, and endless propaganda concerning how scared we all should be about whatever disease is supposedly infecting world populations, as well as beating the drums for imminent war coming from several vectors. Fear does immobilize people, that fact is well known. Unlike the feral populations of the world that can feel it coming and are already running for higher ground, many will be unable to respond in time, which is part of the plan. It is hard to watch it all unfold. Especially the food part of the equation. At least I’m going to get some produce this year, potatoes, tomatoes, and buttercup squash that is finally doing what it’s supposed to do, along with a few ears of corn. The gardening season did go all awry, with bad goats, unpredictable weather, and time I was able to spend with keeping it up, but something is better than nothing. Nature was kind to me anyway, after all.

And lastly, even the totally asleep people I meet daily are aware something is different with our sun. The other day the forecast said it was 80 degrees Fahrenheit, yet in the sun our thermometer was registering well over 100 degrees, and even people who normally worked in this heat for years are noticing a difference. I had one guy who has lived here since the 1960’s say he’s never seen weather like we’ve had here the last couple years. I truly wish I already had that underground bunker. I guess being evaporated in a blast from the sun would probably be fast, at least. I still think something not seen yet is going to happen, too, though, so it’s a very good time to not write the end of the story, and try to get comfortable in that place of total uncertainty. Embracing the unknown is something I strive for every day, though it’s like not having any ground under your feet. Maybe we’ll grow wings?
I see your love shining out from my furry friends faces, when I look into their eyes. I see you in the flower’s smile, the rainbow, and the wind in the trees....
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Re: Thoughts, thoughts, too many thoughts...

Post by Christine »

Laurie's too many thoughts are always enlightening to read. I feel she expresses the continual need to rebalance, realign and reimagine our reality in a near constant. It's definitely off the charts surreal. The prevailing narrative has gone off any track and is careening to a hard stop soon. I mostly deal with it with a great sense of humor, it helps when you become convinced that we are living in a simulation or as Jason Bershers calls it, the Simulacrum. It's easy to see those who are de-souled and vacant of any empathy so they become the NPCs, a cast of characters on the stage to convince us that the narrative contains anything real to it. It's also uplifting to see more people starting to rub the sleep from their eyes, it is abundantly clear that the world as we knew it is pixilating into oblivion and most people sense this even though they haven't allowed it to seep into their conscious domain. It is going to happen though, inevitable. And that is when we will really get to see the clear divide.

For myself there are some of the deepest feeling rising as to the depth of the evil, as bad as the surface scum and slime is, it's the blood sacrifice and dark rituals that underlay it all that are so disturbing so that it takes the most courageous of hearts to confront it. I won't go into this on this thread but I find myself drawn deep into the mire to bear the light on where it must shine.

P.S. The forum and website went array, found out it was because Starfield Creations hadn't been updated and was pulling too much data from our shared server. Speaking of Starfield Creations, I found time to make some new orgonite pyramids, it is soul satisfying works and I immediately started to creative flow so hope to create more pieces this weekend.
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Re: Thoughts, thoughts, too many thoughts...

Post by Spiritwind »

There are many streams in the mountains, winding their way to the sea. Each with its own unique origin and journey, yet still flowing ever closer to the larger stream of consciousness, where it meets its family.

I had a dream I was flying last night, with a Freedom loving likeminded friend. And, I keep having flashes of the old ones, the ones with shining countenances and abilities that sound like fiction. I feel they are awakening, somehow, in these many waters, who think they all are separate, yet the Mother knows your name. She also knows your game, and she will use you all the same.

She’s coming alive within you, in your thoughts and dreams. When you follow your imagination, letting beauty, grace, and gratitude lead the way, she’ll mold you like the clay you are, into a work of art. Because that’s what she does....

https://odysee.com/@OwenBenjamin:6/episode1489:9

As usual, I have limited time before I head off to “the job”. I haven’t had an opportunity to listen to this yet, but I will. Some of the folks I’ve been networking with the last couple years have joined a movement right up in my neck of the woods, that was started by this Owen Benjamin. I was going to look into who he is, but haven’t really had the window of time to make it happen. Then Christine shared this video, not knowing I had just heard about him, so I’m posting it here to come back to, as well as perhaps allowing others who likewise didn’t know about it the opportunity to check him out. Even though it feels somewhat like everything is in slow motion, it also feels like it’s all moving very fast. Strange indeed.

Also, the newest book I’m reading just came out by Tom Montalk, called Gnosis: Alchemy, Grail, Ark, and the Demiurge. If you like pondering the bigger picture, Tom has done a good job tying many things together, especially if you’ve had fringe experiences yourself and know that it is all much more complex, and even bizarre, compared to what we were all taught about our reality growing up. It’s given me much to think about, what I’ve read so far. We have a very interesting future ahead of us.
I see your love shining out from my furry friends faces, when I look into their eyes. I see you in the flower’s smile, the rainbow, and the wind in the trees....
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Re: Thoughts, thoughts, too many thoughts...

Post by Spiritwind »

I have been re-reading some of the Ringing Cedars series of books, and I want to make mention of the fact that these books deeply influenced me when I first read a few about 11 years ago. I’ve wandered all over the place since then, researching many topics. It’s interesting to go back through some of the material presented in these books and see now how much they still ring true, in so many ways. The following writing was influenced by them and came out of my mornings meditation a few days ago. I’ve written on this same theme many times. As I told my husband a couple nights ago, if I have the capacity and awareness, in each and every passing moment of my experience here, I will chose love, every time. I’m going home, whatever that really means. I know I can’t take any of the accumulated darkness within me to get there. All past resentments, hurts, anger, grief, sorrow, regrets, they must be released. Every one of them. I am actively working on this. And I don’t care if anyone else “gets it”. I’m going anyway. My husband hangs on to much from his past, and it isn’t helping him. Trauma from when he was in the military, and from soured family interactions over the years. And it colors his interactions in the present. This problem abounds on the earth, and only proliferates the dark ones intentions. It’s time to let it all go....


They’ve herded everyone into the cities on purpose. Being out here on this land has changed me, in a very fundamental way. I am literally surrounded by a circle of very tall beautiful fir and pine trees, and a perfect view of the night sky, from the east all the way across the ecliptic. I have literally come into quite direct contact with the intelligence of this planet, this realm, that is actively engaged in the ongoing process of creating and sustaining this reality as we collectively experience it. It IS very loving, very truthful, very non-interfering in our individual life experiences. But, when engaged, with an open heart and a little trust, it very much can be accessed and communicated with. Especially this past year here, I wake up early, and get to basically just get in the space, and there are many ways to do that, prayer, meditation, drumming, chanting, even sitting in silence and inwardly letting this intelligence know you would like to engage with it as I do everyday, being just some examples. There are also many names for this intelligence, spanning time and world religions and religious figures. It is benevolent, never lies, is never intrusive, shaming, anxiety producing, or manipulative, as many other less beneficial thoughts and emotions are.

Of course, I can’t prove I’m having these conversations in my head with a more expanded intelligence than I currently seem to have. But I can testify to the fairly dramatic change in my inward terrain, and ability to work through my own so very human responses to this time we are quickly moving into, with almost lightening speed. Where is it going? I don’t even have time to listen to the many other voices out there, who are thoughtfully wanting to know, and are evaluating the many signs of the times that are changing all around us. I do know there are some very dark forces at work trying to take us into an apocalyptic outcome that leaves them, their families and empires, intact, and the rest of us either dead or in dire straights. Basically a hell on earth. But what really drives this agenda?

An ancient priesthood that survived from the time before the fall of Atlantis and has kept this now occult body of knowledge to themselves. All the rest of the Atlantean people that survived have been systematically exterminated since the time of the fall. The fall was indeed a decrease in consciousness that occurred, a plunge into darkness. For it was a darkness that caused the fall, fostering a desire to experience things that had unknown consequences, and a want for more. An opening of Pandora’s box. The thing is, who is the story teller? What if it’s us? What if some of us whose bloodlines miraculously survived the fall and have in our DNA the memories of our ancestors, of who our people were before, and are suddenly finding we can access some of these ancestral memories of life before the fall?

What if we begin to realize the hoodwink, the trap, the shiny beads that were used to razzle dazzle us into being hooked. We begin to see the magician’s construct that lies behind all of what we were sold by the servants of this one who stands above them all. There can be only one. A mind so powerful that it was able to over ride the original plan, that was to allow individuated spirits to experience physical creation, and interact with it, much as kids do in video games. It was to learn, have fun, create, explore. It was not intended as it has become. I have personally experienced the trap in some of its many manifestations. Ways in which I became totally sucked in as if in a spiders web. I’ve had to slowly extricate myself from that over a painfully long period of time. I say painful, because as you become more aware, and conscious, it is a painful experience. There is suffering involved, to some extent. I now see the path both ahead and behind. I see how before I became more aware I made many choices out of fear, not believing in myself, feeling powerless and just not knowing it could be any different. I was also unable to see the darkness for what it was that was actually all around me. Now I know, there WAS (and is) a bogey man.

The world did not come to this place of mass hypnosis, mass deceit, death, and suffering by accident. It came into being because we were tricked. Now it is time for us to pull the curtain back and see who has really been pulling the strings all this time, while we wandered through the bardo land. Not with malice, or with hatred, for evil cannot be overcome with the same energy which created it. It has planted many seeds in our psyches, our beliefs, over a long period of time. We must begin to tend to that forgotten secret, and purposefully hidden from us garden, that has always been there waiting for us, to remember. To remember who we were, before the fall. We were not bad. Curious, yes, but not bad. In fact, there was great joy in that time before the fall, and abilities we are only now beginning to wake up to. It’s all there for us, coming back around, as the pendulum always does. All we have to do is remember.

Spend more time in nature, pay more attention when you are there. There is a whole other reality going on right before our eyes all the time, one we can access. It is just as real, in fact more real, than the artificially manufactured one that we have all been plugged in to, just like the movie the matrix depicts, for such a long time. I do feel an opportunity to change the outcome is very real. You just have to believe. And the more of us that do that, that don’t just shrug off those subtle inner nudges, that something is indeed different about our times, and it’s not all bad, the more the darkness scurries away, as if a door with shining light has been opened. We DID used to have it all.
I see your love shining out from my furry friends faces, when I look into their eyes. I see you in the flower’s smile, the rainbow, and the wind in the trees....
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