Pray for My Son

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Naga_Fireball
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Re: Pray for My Son

Post by Naga_Fireball »

It was very stressful. The doctor seemed nice but completely disconnected from the world of actual research.

They are way too comfortable charting the experimental trial and error of Is It Actually Fucking Them Up.

That's like knowing a nuke will blow up the average city but continuing to drop them just to see what happens.

I made a fool of myself in the doctor's office due to being overtired. Hopefully it won't matter.

I told them it will take a judge's order if they want a doctor's order, when the objecting parent is sitting right there... so psycho to keep trying to convince me.

Ugh Christ.

I hope i bought him some time.
Brotherhood falls asunder at the touch of fire!
He finds his fellow guilty of a skin
Not coloured like his own, and having power
To enforce the wrong, for such a worthy cause
Dooms and devotes him as his lawful prey.
~William Cowper
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Re: Pray for My Son

Post by Naga_Fireball »

I heard that my dear 8 year old son Paul has been moved from his group home this morning. They alleged some incidents and decided it was an absolute emergency and sent him on.

Please pray for him that he is safe and not being abused, that his transport to Spokane was safe and uneventful, and that our visits are resumed ASAP if possible.

There are not too many folks in his life who can provide any continuity. . And I was taking a mini vacation when this happened and was not in town.

Holy shit.
Brotherhood falls asunder at the touch of fire!
He finds his fellow guilty of a skin
Not coloured like his own, and having power
To enforce the wrong, for such a worthy cause
Dooms and devotes him as his lawful prey.
~William Cowper
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Re: Pray for My Son

Post by Naga_Fireball »

Hey guys n gals..

I heard today that he is doing pretty well.
School not yet. But manager took him to a store and let him walk the aisles and pick out some toys for himself. Apparently my son listened to this guy when he got too far away in the store lol.

They say he is bored when the others go to school, but soon he can go. Paperwork ; (

They have a swing in back that he likes according to recent update, and the staff members are feeding him lots of. ... apples!!!!

@@

Cute huh :)
Brotherhood falls asunder at the touch of fire!
He finds his fellow guilty of a skin
Not coloured like his own, and having power
To enforce the wrong, for such a worthy cause
Dooms and devotes him as his lawful prey.
~William Cowper
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Naga_Fireball
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Re: Pray for My Son

Post by Naga_Fireball »

His CASA recently visited. I'm pretty relieved.

Dunno why but I had it in my head that it would be really scary for him being around older boys. The risk of sexual abuse i guess. No one wants to hear that something like that happened.

They got him a tablet!! The iPad got thrown etc so much that the last place exhausted the warranty. Their SW did try pretty hard to keep it working but then at a school meeting we were told there are more rugged types of tablet. Yay.

:)

/miss him
Brotherhood falls asunder at the touch of fire!
He finds his fellow guilty of a skin
Not coloured like his own, and having power
To enforce the wrong, for such a worthy cause
Dooms and devotes him as his lawful prey.
~William Cowper
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Naga_Fireball
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Re: Pray for My Son

Post by Naga_Fireball »

So the day before Thanksgiving I hear from the local caseworker, that "the school won't increase his time etc" unless my son is vaccinated.

Wrong.

In Washington state, the parents and or caseworker caregiver etc person with guardianship, can visit a doctor to get a vaccine exemption waiver signed regardless of who disagrees.

This social worker, i used to like him somewhat, but he seems so distracted and disinterested, it's amazing that he knowingly "goes there " with an autism family......




He sucks in that regard. Jesus Christ can't doctors do well child checks without needles? Lol.

They say my son was re evaluated by the new school and he "blew them away" ie higher performance than before at his other depressing school.


And the guy who runs the group home seems very nice.


I just hope they don't flip me a huge shit brick about vaccine this n that. Ffs
Brotherhood falls asunder at the touch of fire!
He finds his fellow guilty of a skin
Not coloured like his own, and having power
To enforce the wrong, for such a worthy cause
Dooms and devotes him as his lawful prey.
~William Cowper
Sandy Clark
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Re: Pray for My Son

Post by Sandy Clark »

Good to hear there is more positive than negative with this new info Naga_Fireball ...
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Re: Pray for My Son

Post by Naga_Fireball »

Thank you Sandy,
Unfortunately at the previous group home, they had just hired a new staff nurse about a month or two before he moved north -- she is super duper pro medication and super duper pro vaccine, and somehow did not "see that Paul had an exemption" before inviting a Safeway pharmacist (carpetbagggg) to give him a "flu shot" in September.

Also, this caseworker has been with us for four years and still Doesn't Remember or Doesn't Agree that parents in Wa have the right to object..........


Eek.


My kid seems really strong and doesn't have asthma etc. There's no reason I can see to shoot him up.
Brotherhood falls asunder at the touch of fire!
He finds his fellow guilty of a skin
Not coloured like his own, and having power
To enforce the wrong, for such a worthy cause
Dooms and devotes him as his lawful prey.
~William Cowper
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Naga_Fireball
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Re: Pray for My Son

Post by Naga_Fireball »

P.s
Meant to add, the social worker at that group home was morally upright and honest when i asked if the bandaid on my kid was vaccine related.

God bless her, at least tomorrow i can add her to the good list
Brotherhood falls asunder at the touch of fire!
He finds his fellow guilty of a skin
Not coloured like his own, and having power
To enforce the wrong, for such a worthy cause
Dooms and devotes him as his lawful prey.
~William Cowper
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Naga_Fireball
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Re: Pray for My Son

Post by Naga_Fireball »

I felt sorry for that nurse, but she (sorta like the special education teacher at school two months ago ) reminded me some of nurse Ratchett from One Flew Over the Cuckoos Nest. So personally invested in the halloween horseshit of big pharma that she'd sell her own family out to the devil that pays her bills. And said as much.



Personally? If Darwin was right we should be treating these kids with respect, maybe even Godlike respect, what if human potential is all there is, would we throw it away for a dollar?




The same pieces of shit who enabled the oxycontin epidemic that killed my dad enables the Nazi fucking sweeping vaccine mandatory horse shit Im talking about.
Brotherhood falls asunder at the touch of fire!
He finds his fellow guilty of a skin
Not coloured like his own, and having power
To enforce the wrong, for such a worthy cause
Dooms and devotes him as his lawful prey.
~William Cowper
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Naga_Fireball
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Re: Pray for My Son

Post by Naga_Fireball »

https://mobile.nytimes.com/2017/01/19/w ... other.html" onclick="window.open(this.href);return false;

After Losing a Foster Child, Contemplating Another

JANUARY 19, 2017
Voices
By MEGHAN MORAVCIK WALBERT

He’s sitting on a couch with his brothers, presumably in the home in which he’s now growing up. The photo has a graininess to it that is reminiscent of photos from the 1980s, but this picture is much more recent than that. It’s the first visual I’ve had of my former foster son since I hugged him goodbye.

The boy we nicknamed “BlueJay” lived with us for almost a year when extended family members stepped forward to take custody of him and his two brothers back in March. In the series Foster Parent Diary, I wrote about the experience of loving and losing him. Now, I zoom in and out of this photo, studying every blurry detail. I know he was 4 years old when the photo was taken, the same age he was when he left our home, but he looks so much older. I can see how his legs are longer, his shoulders broader.

His biological mother sent me the picture. She and I have remained in contact since he left. As far as I know, it is the only photo she has received since her son went to live in a home several hours away from her. The updates she gets and passes along to me are sporadic and superficial. I’m not sure even she really knows how he is doing.

I dream about him. In my dreams, he’s always a little bit older with slightly more chiseled features. Sometimes he remembers me, sometimes he doesn’t. Sometimes he runs into my arms, sometimes he runs from them. On the days when he remembers me, when I pull him in for a tight hug and he asks me where I’ve been, it feels so real that I wake up with an irrational hope that he had the same dream, too. That maybe we’d found a way to cross the distance between us, just for a moment.

My son, Ryan, who is now 6 years old, recently asked me if we could call his former foster brother one day to talk to him, to tell him we miss him.

“I’m sorry, buddy, we can’t,” I said.

“But why?”


But why. It is the central question I have struggled with over the past 10 months. Why couldn’t we stay in his life? Why couldn’t we send him a new outfit for school or call him to wish him a happy birthday when he recently turned 5? Why couldn’t we continue to offer him our love from afar?

We couldn’t because his relatives didn’t want us to. They didn’t see the point of it, the value in it. They wanted a clean break.

A lot of time has passed since our foster son left. We talk about him more with smiles now than with tears. We’ve given ourselves the time and space needed to figure out whether the hole in our lives is one that only he was meant to fill or whether our family is still incomplete.

Finally, we are starting to feel ready. My husband, Mike, and I are preparing, once again, for foster care adoption.

We’re being more cautious and more deliberate this time. This time, we are moving slowly. This time, we are more educated and less exuberant.

We are setting new parameters. We will consider only children who are legally free for adoption or as close to it as possible. We will not be called one day and asked to pick up a child in need of an immediate, temporary home. This time, we will be matched with a child who may have been waiting for a permanent family for as long as we’ve been waiting to complete ours. Realistically, that probably means a child Ryan’s age or older. There will be fliers with pictures and stacks of files and the child’s own opinions to consider.

Caring for a child for almost a year and then being given less than 24 hours to pack him up and say a permanent goodbye changes a person. It strips you of your naïveté. It inflicts a sense of loss that cuts deep. It can harden you with cynicism, sadness and fear, if you let it.

Our former foster son looks different in the photo. He is not smiling. He’s staring into the camera with a blank look I don’t recognize on him. He doesn’t look like the happy, spunky little boy I knew. He looks more like how I felt for months after he left: Dazed. The longer I stare at the photo, the more I wish I’d never seen it.

Then again, it’s just one picture. One moment out of a billion moments in his lifetime. How could one picture be a fair representation of his current life? Maybe he was tired or bored or cranky when it was taken. Maybe, overall, things are going great for him. Do I have a real reason to believe otherwise? All I have is one picture.

We can choose the cynicism, the sadness and the fear, or we can choose hope. We can shrivel up into a hardened ball, or we can pick ourselves up, dust off our arms, shake out our hair and press forward.

We can acknowledge our own heartache for what it was: The inevitable result of fully loving a child who was never really ours. There was no mistake in that.

We can let go of our worry and instead, believe in him. Believe that he’s strong enough to overcome the hardships of his early life, strong enough to thrive.

We can allow ourselves to hope the final piece of our family’s puzzle is still out there. We can close our eyes, take a deep breath, center ourselves. And then we can go in search of that piece.

Meghan Moravcik Walbert is a freelance journalist and essayist based in Pennsylvania’s Lehigh Valley. Her experience as a foster parent is chronicled in Foster Parent Diary.
Brotherhood falls asunder at the touch of fire!
He finds his fellow guilty of a skin
Not coloured like his own, and having power
To enforce the wrong, for such a worthy cause
Dooms and devotes him as his lawful prey.
~William Cowper
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