A Public Statement, On A Very Private Matter....

[Exit-0]

Hum.... can I do that here?

observer's official reply:

1. I've had a bad feeling on the Avalon Forum regarding the treatment I have personally received, and the treatment other individuals have received for quite some time, several of them both friends and supporters.

2. At least 18 months ago, I began checking around with other individuals and discovered there's a long list of former members who have received similar treatment on that website. I even sent Mr. Ryan a Private Message regarding my concerns about a suspected Scientology "Club" Agenda.

3. So, everything being said in that regard is absolutely correct. If seeking the Truth, and standing firmly on the evidence I’ve discovered makes me an enemy of Avalon, than perhaps it was time for me to leave that website.

4. I strongly feel there were certain individuals (whom I will not name) that did conspire to derail my threads and comments on that site – if not “conspire”, did regularly work to derail. I've held that mindset for quite some time.

5. I'm guilty of lashing-back after consecutive woundings (of what I feel were) repeated, coordinated attacks being executed. When it became my perception that another wave of attacks was occurring, this kneejerk reaction was what led to my forced-unsubscribing at that website.

6. I had absolutely no complacency in my friend heyokah's decision to trick the administration into reregistering under a different name (the alleged "sock puppet affair"). When she did that, I was undergoing a major surgery, and recovering. I only found out of her trickery shortly before I began posting again on that site - after an extended break from posting.

7. My friend heyokah is a trickster - true to form. It’s her special way, and the reason we are such friends. But, her trickery is wholly dedicated to transparency, and justice. It was that very dedication that got her unsubscribed from the Avalon Website (as heyokah), in the first place, where she went to the defense of Christine in denouncing what was publicly being done at that time.

8. I did attempt to keep TeXaR (heyokah's persona) protected from discovery by making a "member's only" comment regarding how I missed heyokah. She had been shadowing my comments much too closely, as TeXaR. I made the "missing heyokah" comment only to prevent TeXaR's discovery, and I was being sincere in recounting how I truly missed the interaction we had once shared (as heyokah).

9. TeXaR/heyokah, and I never plotted, or conspired to do any harm to the Avalon Website. Our only agreement was regarding the issue covered in Item #4. Throughout my long friendship with her, she has only ever supported my work with encouragement and enthusiasm.

10. Since I first started posting on the internet, so many years ago, and well before Avalon, my only agenda was to present my World View to interested individuals, void of condemnation, or controversy.

11. I'm deeply hurt that my name is now being publicly vilified at the Avalon Website, and I'm concerned what that vilification will do to my many years of hard work.

Please, any concerned individual, copy-and-paste this statement into the Avalon Forum.

[Anders]

Those kinds of conflict sound precisely like what Eckhart Tolle has called pain body attacks. I think Tolle has an excellent description except it seems to me that he doesn't fully explain what causes the pain body other than he says that it's a result of our past emotional pain. I believe the pain body is caused by the nervous system numbing out suffering in the body. Too much and to prolonged numbing out of feelings causes the biological tissue to deteriorate. So in a desperate attempt the mind in conflict with itself needs to combat too much numbness and therefore subconsciously and/or consciously seeks emotional pain, often in the form of anger, conflicts with other people, social dramas and other means to just be able to feel more.

[youtube]https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=AcYrm7h86Rk[/youtube]

Dissolving the pain body according to my theory has to be done by removing the continuous numbing out of the nervous system. And Eckart Tolle has an excellent (although in my experience tedious and slow) method of dissolving the pain body through inner body awareness practice.

[youtube]https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YOoXFense4Q[/youtube]

[Hermit]

I'm not sure what this is all about.

Whatever it is, I only have one request.

Please, be very deeply mindful of the energy and sacredness of the space you're writing in. The people here are connected to each other in a very powerful and positive way. I'm not saying this because it may disrupt that. On the contrary.

I'm going to ask everyone who reads this thread, as only a minor member of this forum, to please consider very carefully before copying and pasting anything anywhere.

And for goodness sakes. Pray for everyone involved. It's time to stop letting the hurt and anger run the keyboards of our computers.

Exit-O? Go outside. Work your soil, and if you don't have soil, find some. Plant something. Nurture something to grow and live. I'm going to tell you something really important. Soil work is the deepest and most powerful magic out there. Soil contains elements that actually combat depression and negative emotional energy. Till your soil, and pray for your enemies at the same time.

And the hardest thing...exercise some mercy. For them, and especially for you.

[Phil]

It definitely stings for awhile, but given some time you will see how silly is to want to be part of a club that won't have you as a member...and sees you as dark, an enemy.

Then you start to realize the upsetting part is that the place we felt was so different...the supposed "alternative" to the heirarchical control structures we like to discuss how to transcend or change in order to "save the world" is identical, a microcosm.

I'd be interested to see what would happen if your comments got some views there, I was pretty attached to he idea of the long-timers being faced with the behavior they excuse, but you should definitely focus on working out that attachment (if your feelings are similar to how I described mine were), considering that history shows any solid criticism will be censored.

I posted a copy here, not that it will do much good but it's another place you can point:

http://openuptoday.freeforums.net/post/204" onclick="window.open(this.href);return false;

[Christine]

Dear Exit-0 (observer),

And to any who would read these words I wish to express a few poignant thoughts and then let go again. Before saying more I wish to thank Hermit for reminding everyone that Earth Empaths is a sacred place, and as such it is a space that opens for a person to express freely in, as Exit-0 has done. We can philosophize, we can work toward forgiveness, we will eventually heal but in the moment the sting of injustice hurts so expressing oneself is a step on the journey of letting go. We can simply listen beyond prejudice, in trust.

I have made my views clear on the politics of the project forum, it seems ages ago now that I took any note at all of the minutia of the back staging and drama there, as the same pattern plays out again and again I have no interest in engaging further. Nothing is served except to keep a group of folks caught in a looping action that always feeds back to itself.

I am grateful for what I learned, for all of the experience including the sorrowful part at the end ... Energetically I am blessed for I was sling shot into a new orbit, one of such tender beauty and awakened consciousness that I simply have no time for regrets or looking back. All I can do is empathize in the moment and honor a man's feeling of need to clear his name.

There is a very big picture, there is Love ...the rest is silly people playing silly games making enemies when there are none but the ones they themselves create.

Closing with a favorite quote, one I revisit daily seems appropriate here.

Your task is not to seek for love, but merely to seek and find all the barriers within yourself that you have built against it. ~ Rumi

Christine

[Phil]

it seems ages ago now that I took any note at all of the minutia of the back staging and drama there, as the same pattern plays out again and again I have no interest in engaging further. Nothing is served except to keep a group of folks caught in a looping action that always feeds back to itself.

What a great statement, and I hold out hope for the seemingly impossible, because the draw of that place is the number of brilliant thinkers and wonderful writers and loving individuals contributing to a seemingly extremely diverse collection of information. So while it's easy to direct the hurt from rejection (and lies/coverup) toward the admin, the sad fact is that it's the membership, particularly the seemingly brightest that have been around longest, learned to discern, participated in those loop...enabling. It's so hard cuz it seems so obvious they should know better.

What you will find with the direct "donk-ish" approach is a lot of disappointment. You may get one or two to finally stop denying/excusing the hypocracy...decide they had enough, but what I've seen time and again is people I respected and looked up to engaging in the same dynamic of abusive families, getting defensive by twisting anyone's criticism or issues into the acts of an enemy.

So in addition to hermit's reminder to try to make sure we do our best to do things differently here (just continue to take care on how you word things, I don't think I have to remind you but I've found any negativity leveled that way is met with anxiety by the observers wherever it pops up), and my pointing you to a place I created with the sole intent to redirect the most negative of the energy that needs venting (even if it's just to me and peeps that like to read my venting)...I want to say I like your post/thread and the way you've spoken so far, and just wanted to suggest that even though direct hammering in the Project's been done time and again--I'll offer support in any way I can (not that I can do much other than offer perspectives and encouragement and a place to vent), maybe we can come up with an effective approach.

The thing is, in that environment..."reporting" your friend, who was acting the "SP", needed to come in front of your priorities....while we all love the information sharing that happens over there, "safety and security" of membership (and their view of admin and the Project) comes first, and pointing out stuff like you're trying to violates that, and is rarely received well--no matter how carefully you word it. You ain't wit 'em, you agin 'em....or something like that

[Exit-0]

Honor is one of a man's greatest attributes. Many souls have given their lives to uphold their honor, albeit some in deluded pursuit.

To falsely strip a man of his honor is among the greatest of evils....

Thank you all for your input.

[Naga_Fireball]

Honor is one of a man's greatest attributes. Many souls have given their lives to uphold their honor, albeit some in deluded pursuit.

To falsely strip a man of his honor is among the greatest of evils....

Thank you all for your input.

I meant to write something supportive last night.
I'm actually glad/relieved regarding your honestly and willingness to share.

Also considering how fast they change subjects over there, should we be so worried? I'm impressed by your courage and hope those who chose to say what they did, did not piss you off too much.

It is healthy to identify wounds rather than ignoring them wholesale --

Hope I'm not out of line saying this. I noticed Christine is largely supportive but hope we all understand that people heal at differeing rates.

[Naga_Fireball]

I'm going to double post and make a Lord of the Rings LOTR reference.

When the party of the ringbearer reach the forest stronghold of Lothlorien, Frodo offers Galadriel a huge chance to join the Personality Cult of the ring of power (lol).

She struggles with considerable temptation before refusing The Ring and says she will diminish and pass into the West, rather than remain on Project middle earth (hee).

But once she passes over and joins her elvish immortal friends in valinor, things probably start getting better for her.


Too bad in a way that the corrupted Ring of Personality Dazzling was not destroyed. The Master of the Ring would probably love to be rid of it but can't bring himself to cast it into Mount Doomtard.


How are we doing. :madgrin:

[Spiritwind]

Good to see you back here Observer/Exit-O. You certainly went above and beyond to maintain your long term presence on Avalon and I can relate to your "observations". Like any relationship, it can be hard to move on, especially when so many other family members are left behind. I didn't get unsubscribed only because I asked to retire and was put on sabbatical I believe, even though I occasionally still go there to read up on the rare topic of interest that gets posted there. I will always be thankful, though, for all the truly wonderful people I have been meeting and actually getting to know this past year, as a result of my presence there for over three years.

Many of us have begun to really want to get more into the doing, rather than just acquiring more information. With all that is going on in the world today, it seems the time of action has finally arrived. I want to be part of the solution, instead of just contributing, due to inaction, to being a continuing part of the problem. That in itself keeps me quite busy. Not a day goes by where I don't realize more and more the various ways I am still part of the problem, simply due to acquired life long habits that can be challenging to change. Unfortunately, there are still many who feel they have it all figured out and have no problem feeling they are somehow above the masses. Hopefully, they too someday will realize we have all contributed to getting us collectively where we are today. But I can't take responsibility for the whole world, just myself is work enough.

I noticed that you were posting about Yellowstone when the axe came down. There is certainly a world wide uptick in seismic activity, and we all know that we will not be given accurate or timely information about what is really going on. I do feel a sense of being on heightened alert status. So we still need to share our observations, and try to keep an open mind so that we do not overlook opportunities to baton down the hatches if need be. I lived on a sailboat for a few years, and if it were not for my husband and stepson listening to their intuition about the rudder possibly malfunctioning and having a plan and materials on board in case of such an emergency, I might not even be here now to tell the story of our hair raising adventure.

We all know there are forces that certainly appear to be working against us, and they use every opportunity to pit people against one another. Nowadays, I always see that there is a Wizard of Odd behind the curtain manipulating our responses through our subconscious and unknown parts of ourselves. So even our hurts show us where we need to shore things up, so we can be strong in the face of what lies ahead. I know I have certainly been encountering my share of challenging circumstances, and I'm sure I am not alone in this. Even though I want to go hide in a cave somewhere, I'd best pull myself up by my bootstraps and hit the ground running. May we all be able to rise to the occasion.