Yesterday was a normal day, cleaning house and puttering in the garden. As the day drew to a close I felt many strange and dark presences gathering, strange inner visions of colored lights swirled and a sense of foreboding kept me awake long into the night. These dark forces are always present but usually not so close, they attempt to drive a wedge into the heart or cloud the mind with doubts and fears. My body was feeling a prickly energy pushing in, definitely not pleasant, all I could do was stay quiet and allow this to pass, knowing that by doing so it had to pass.
Having spent the last months reading or listening to scripture, delving into esoteric lore and knowledge, and following the flow of my own memories recapitulated into an ever expanding presence, I came upon something seemingly immovable, seemingly insurmountable standing in front of me. It beckons and yet blocks, all I know now is that to meet it I must be immovable and insurmountable within my resolve, within my heart core for its apparent presence emanates a mocking grin that says; "You shall not escape." Is this the voice of the ruler of the false matrix into which I have fallen? Is this voice death itself? Is this the keeper of the threshold who guards the door to eternal life?
I know not and in this not knowing I rest and let go to a higher call, a higher aspect of Being that will guide me as surely as I give praise to the beauty of this life, to the, at times, truncated sense of joy, to the Christ within, to the flame eternally lit. And as is the way of the Great One I stumbled unto this video this morning. John St. Julien speaks so clearly of what I know and have experienced, his voice a calm flowing stream. He says two things in this video that I have been speaking of for years, most people around me don't hear what I say for they are still living in the box their minds have made. I have posed a question to my Bible loving friends, several actually, however, the one I am insistent on is this; "Why do Christians still follow the old Testament?" For over a decade the jealous god of the old testament has left me doubting that this is God, I have written about this extensively so will not say more in this short writing. The other aspect of this is that I have never shaken a feeling that, what we humans are dealing with is an invading presence, something alien to Earth and therefore alien to us.
So I sit at my kitchen table this morning, sipping on my vanilla sweet coffee and looking out the window at the dawning still morning, the sky is blue and a slight wind rustles some leaves in the top of the trees. Peace prevails.
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The journey, the challenge is to step into the
projection room and stop being lost in the script.